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treebear | 21:20 Wed 22nd Jan 2014 | How it Works
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Some years ago one of my best mates was sent to prison. Before the sentence he gave all his money to a friend of mine. I stood close to him because I needed to know the truth ( all his other friends disappeared at the beginning) I helped him admit his quilt without the need for his accusers to testify. He is soon to be released and recently the person who has looked after his money has given to me saying they have no wish to ever talk to him again. I have talked to his ex wife suggesting that his children should have it., but she too won't touch it. So I am on the horns, this cash was part of his and his wife's she does not want it the person he gave it to does not want it. I took hold of this money because I thought his ex wife would take it. I feel that it is his children that should benefit but how do give it to them with their mothers knowing
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Wait until he is released. Give him his money back. What's the problem?
You can't, it's not yours to give to anyone. Give it back to him when he comes out.
It's his money isn't it, so I'm not sure what the issue is here.
Yep, same as the others. Wait until he comes out and give him the money. He's going to need every penny isn't he?
Is the money the proceeds of some criminal activity? Is that what he was sent down for. If so, there are some moral implications.
There is something wrong with me: you give the fella the money when he is released from prison. It is after all his, and he will need it when he is released.

The legal position is clear - you are holding the money in trust...
The fact you cant place the money at present doesnt change the legal position.

You should also keep a clear note somewhere
so that if yo should get run over ( no not by relatives of the fella) by accident then your heirs know that £ x, 000 is not yours but someone elses.

People change - if the mother gets short of money she may well swallow her scruples and take the money on behalf of her children.

You should keep records so that if in the future you do find your fingernails being ripped out, you can say - Oh yes I do remember what I did with it.....

Question Author
Okay there 's a bit more stuff ( as there always is ) this money Was actually his ex wife's she gave him control of it because ( my Words ) thats what controlling men do
well, you say she doesn't want it now - so give it to him, let him make the decision. Not your call.
It's still his money. Wait 'til he gets out and give him it. You may want to suggest he uses some to give his kids a treat or open a bank account for them.
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Question Author
answer to chewn.. nobody had to give evidence against him so I Know my conversations helped .... His attitude before was make them prove it .. But his quilt is not where we Or I am now I have some money that I Think belongs to his family not him ( I thought his ex wife would say yes ) but
You've had plenty of advice. All saying, "The money is his. Give it to him".
Is this not the advice you wanted?
You should either give it back to him or give it back to the person who gave it to you. It's not your money so you can't decide to distribute it as you see fit
Should have put, "Is this not the answer you wanted"?
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Question Author
I'm asking for advice I would have taken hold of this money if `I feltbthat all the people involved were so anti it
Having involved yourself by accepting the money from the original 'minder' you have now but one choice - give it to him, hope he is penitent and uses the money to get back on and stay on the straight and narrow.
Mamyalynne
By return it to "him" I presume you mean the guy coming out of prison.
That's what everyone has been saying. It's up to treebear now, if he takes all the advice he has received or not. final words
I do indeed mean the person being released from Prison, I apologise if that was unclear by my 'straight and narrow' reference.
Question Author
This money belongs to the family ( in my eyes). but it's as much his wife's as his and she won't touch it so rightfully I should give it too him on his release ( I understand) but Morally the children have had nothing and he will get some cash
from people who no longer respect him

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