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Mustn't Kiss The Grannies Or Grandads - Unbelievable!

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carolegif | 09:21 Wed 08th Jan 2014 | News
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The Mail Online (can't do links, sorry), has an article where a Miss (says it all!) Lucy Emmerson has advised parents not to kiss their grandparents as they will be prone to sexual abuse! They should wave or 'high 5' them instead!
You couldn't make it up!
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..... but your Granny spitting on a hankie and wiping muck off your face is perfectly acceptable.
11:40 Wed 08th Jan 2014
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/// Which problems are you denying existed, aog? Yewtree spring to mind at any point? ///

/// Good? Incest and child abuse did not start in 1998. In was going on in the 50s and 60s. The fact that no one addressed the problem then is not good, it is bad. ///

Once again one ABer takes my words all out of context and then others rush in to do the same, instead of using a little of the grey matter and realise that my words:

*** Yes they were good, we never had to address these kind of problems way back then. ***

Were appertaining to some modern day parents having 'PROBLEMS' over their children kissing grandparents.




Chewn

/// Report? Is there a link to this report? ///

Perhaps you failed to notice this earlier?

AB Editor
Here's the link:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2535633/Dont-make-kids-kiss-granny-Outcry-sex-education-chiefs-say-high-five-wave-safer.html
Storm in a teacup again. One person advises, on an internet forum, that we should not be teaching our kids to automatically comply with a request from an elder for a gesture of affection should they not wish to, and the Mail repackages that as her saying that all kids should be taught never to offer any gesture of affection at all.

What the woman herself says seems eminently sensible to me. What the Mail claims she says is risible.
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pixie373

/// There does seem to be a bit of confusion about the"halcyon" days though. Some say they were free to be out all day, parents didn't know where they were or what they were doing. They traipsed in when it got dark. ///

And that is perfectly true, but today? unfortunately I'm afraid not it would seem, many more sexual predators around these days for some reason.

AOG
Child abusers rely on children obeying them and doing things they don't want to do because an adult is telling them it is normal. If a child has been forced to kiss relatives they don't want, and an adult has made them comply, then they make accept abuse more readily.

This is not about some evil Disney type villainess leftie trying to spoil things for grandparents, it is someone giving advice that they think will protect children from being vulnerable to predictors, whether in their own family or from strangers.
Chewn

/// That looks suspiciously like a link to a bit of title tattle in a newspaper article to me AOG. Is there a report? ///

Whatever your own diverse interpretation of a report seems to be, it is still a newspaper 'REPORT'.

On what else are we taking our debate/discussion on, if not this 'REPORT'?
For God's sake stop all your 'rounding 'on one another. As so often happens on this site what should be a rational discussion descends into chaos.
"many more sexual predators around these days for some reason. "

How exactly do you know this, AOG?

Haven't there been repeated exposes over the last few years of some of your generations darlings who have actually been child rapists? The only difference now is that people actually pay attention to it, whereas in the "good old days" people seem to have ignored it.

(There is direct experience of this in my family - a relative of my mothers lived above a pub in London while she was a child in the early '60s and was repeatedly abused by one of the barmen. When she told her mother, she chose not to believe her daughter because 'he was a good barman.')
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Are there more child a users today than years ago, or is it that we are more aware? Abuse certainly went on, you could beat your children with sticks and slippers! I had the board rubber thrown at me by a teacher, didn't say anything to parents as would be told off or gated for being in trouble!
There was always the odd person in the street, who was usually looked after by their parents and rarely seen. I think that it is now talked about more.
Jimmy Savile et al, were at large, but nothing was said about it.
Gromit

/// Child abusers rely on children obeying them and doing things they don't want to do because an adult is telling them it is normal. If a child has been forced to kiss relatives they don't want, and an adult has made them comply, then they make accept abuse more readily. ///

And you really think that a child brought up to show love and affection to all those that they hold dear, would be unintelligent enough not to distinguish the different between some one close and a stranger?

By your reasoning it would not be any difference for an adult forcing them to kiss relatives, or any thing else their adults force them to do, they according to you would still do anything any adult told them to do.

I don't think so some how, children are not as naive as perhaps you are.
'...child brought up to show love and affection to all those that they hold dear, would be unintelligent enough not to distinguish the different between some one close and a stranger? '

^^^ Most sexual abuse of children is committed by people close to the family or actual family members. Teaching a child that you ALWAYS have to show affection for adult members of the family or close friends as opposed to when they want to does rather send the message that the adult is always right regardless of their feelings.

Children HAVE to say 'please' and 'thank you' and other terms of politeness. They do not have to give affectionate gestures because an adult tells them to and it is quite appropriate to teach them to give an alternative gesture of affection such as hand waves, blowing kisses, nose rubs etc... anyway, who wants a forced hug/kiss from a child?!
@AoG Your reasoning seems to assume that any adult abuser of the child will be a stranger. Sadly, this is not always the case.It is better for everyone that children are made aware of the risks. Such awareness extends to adults and those in authority too, taking those kids that do report such issues far more seriously, rather than just brushing it under the carpet, or dismissing it as childish fantasy as seems to have been the norm in previous decades. Child sexual abuse most certainly is not a modern day phenomenon.

And Social compliance is extremely powerful, and not just in kids, either.Google Milgram sometime if you want to see just how far ordinary people will go just because of social compliance. But that is straying off the subject a bit.

How can you possibly argue with the notion that kids should not be forced into offering loving gestures, just because some relative demands it?
// And that is perfectly true, but today? unfortunately I'm afraid not it would seem, many more sexual predators around these days for some reason. //

There were sexual predators in the past and in the same numbers. The difference is that newspapers crank up the fear now so parents are more scared than they need to be. And if parents did allow their children out all day, they would be condemned as bad parents.
Chewn

/// There are many definition of 'Report' AOG.
I'm putting this one under 'rumour or gossip' ///

And that is your prerogative.

But rumour ???? "a currently circulating story or report of uncertain or doubtful truth"

Gossip .???? "casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details which are not confirmed as true"

So by filing the report under these headings you are actually saying that what Lucy Emmerson, co-ordinator of the Sex Education Forum was reported as saying is not true, and that by daring to report on it the Daily Mail is just gossiping?


:
How is ANY forced action by a child a "sign of affection"?

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