Gave Me A Lift

[marval]

I was on my way into work and a mate gave me a lift.
No use to me, I live in a bungalow.


This year I've decided to have a marquee put up in my garden with some funky music & flashing lights in.
Now is the winter of my disco tent.


Let me make this perfectly clear.
T H I S.


Just saw a German philosopher out buying fruit.
Pretty sure I've spotted a Nietzsche in the market.


I went to an improve your spelling course at the college and on the door it said 'PSUH'
I thought, "Hmm, that's a bad sign."


People think I'm weird because I'm addicted to laxatives.
But really I'm just a regular guy.


I was at the cash and carry earlier stocking up on fabric conditioner and was devastated to find I couldn't fit it all in the van.
Luckily the wife was only a phone call away and turned up in the car.
We managed to take some comfort in that.


I got offered a job in a wine factory today.
I think I'll mull it over.


I sold a schoolboy a pencil case, protractor and a fountain pen on eBay today.
I threw in a ruler for good measure.


Just seen a fight between an Auctioneer and a Hairdresser.
They were going at each hammer and tongs.

[rosyposy]

Liked all of those marval -rosy :0)

[marval]

Thank you rosy

[excelsior-1]

excellent --- all very good, one or two are brilliant

well done, marval

[starone]

Like all of them marval. lol

[maggiebee]

Wow marval, missed these on Sat. but chuckling tonight.