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Wednesday Ponders

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McMouse | 08:46 Wed 19th Jun 2013 | Jokes
14 Answers
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)




If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

(Now that's more like it!)




The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)




A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.

(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)




A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)

(I'm still not over the pig.)




Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Don't try this at home ; maybe at work.)




The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off..

(Honey, I'm home . What the...?)




The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.

(30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)




The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)




Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity.)




Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Something I always wanted to know.)




The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

(Hmmmmmm......) Husbands know this already!




Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.

(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)




Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.

(Okay, so that would be a good thing.)





A cat's urine glows under a black light.

(I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.)




An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)




Starfish have no brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)




Polar bears are left-handed.

(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)




Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig?)




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Mrsfactor just said 'oink'
Mrs Pig : Get a move on or we'll be late

Mr Pig : I know, I'm coming
Lol.
actually, thought strongest muscle was uterus?!
Pigs have orgasms??
"The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.."

This is not true. The female does not always eat her mate, and if she does, it often occurs as he moves away after mating. Scientists have decided that a hungry female will eat a male after mating, but a female who has recently eaten will not.

It is not a condition of mating that the female eats the male before, during or after mating - it depends on circumstances.
Andy, try telling that to my OH ;-)
"Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump."

That's not true either - sloths cannot jump.

i think you are getting your 'facts' from the Internet which continues these myths - usually uncluding -

"A duck's quack does not echo, and no-one know why."

which is also patently untrue - all sound echoes.


Question Author
Thanks andy. I laways wondered what the Mantis was praying for.
Question Author
^^^^always
"Polar bears are left-handed."

Nope. Scientists studying polar bears have noticed no discernable preference for one paw or the other.

And they donit cover their black noses when stalking prey eitther!
Andy, I would rather believe McMouse, sounds much more fun.

I want to be a cross between a pig and a lion :-)
-- answer removed --
I figured that since this was put in jokes it should be treated as such. Some funny ones, especially the lucky pig!

good ones

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