Got Any Fridge Magnet Funnies ?

[olddutch]

Anyone let me have any fridge magnet funnies like those below ? Thanks


"I'm not a complete idiot, some of the parts are missing"

"Housework won't kill you, but why take the chance"

[4candles]

Thank you OD.

Do not wish for everything unless you have a really big cupboard

Borrow from pessimists - they don't expect it back

[olddutch]

"Gran and I are getting on a bit but why do you keep on SHOUTING at us?"

Sorry Ena

Im a bit old and deaf myself so I dont hear it and i thought you and Gran might not hear too - hope you slept well - and Gran too - theyre taking me out soon for a day out - i got very nice carers !

4Candles - very good and even better - youre on a roll now

"My sole purpose in life now is to serve as a warning to others"

[4candles]

If at first you don't succeed sky-diving is not a good idea

[olddutch]

4Candles

good one again - if you carry on like this I'll be forming you a one dutchman fan club !

Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places

or in my case

Old age is when a broad mind and narrow waist have totally changed places !


my carers taking me out now in the pensioners bus - happy day

[4candles]

<blush> The feeling is mutual ;>)

You've come up with some excellent ones too, and askyourgran, and many others. Thanks for starting a great topic. Are you perchance going into manufacturing fridge magnets?

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When in a general store, never ask for anything in particular

[Androcles]

Life is uncertain, eat pud first.....

[Androcles]

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods.

Cats have never forgotten this.

[olddutch]

Thanks to everyone for great contributions

one for the ladies

I have shopped all my life and still have nothing to wear !

[4candles]

That sounds a familiar refrain, OD.

If God had wanted me to eat muesli he would have made it smell like bacon.

[mouse123]

"Sweetie pickers wear bigger knickers!"

[olddutch]

4Candles on the God theme ---- to believers and unbelievers alike

Thank God Im an Athiest !

[Musicman08]

You can take a horse to water, but a pencil must be led !!

[4candles]

With the coming of old age, you may one day find a suppository in one ear; at that moment, you will realise where your hearing aid is.

[olddutch]

4Candles - ta for yet another gem !

My idea of a balanced diet is a doughnut in each hand

[4candles]

Just about running out now!

Lastly -

A room is always at room temperature

When you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

[olddutch]

4Candles brilliant and brillianter !

You cant stop now !

[4candles]

A man can believe that there is good in everyone. But not if he’s met some of the people I have.

[olddutch]

4Candles you havent lost your touch - par exellence - or whatever the French for that is ?


"I was cut out to be rich, but was sewn up wrong"

[BIG DAD]

I no longer skinny dip, i Chunky Dunk.

[olddutch]

no one is ever listening until you make a mistake

If a blond said what she thought she'd be speechless