Mad Over 50's Club now open

[Mamyalynne]

Once again I find myself as host as her Ladyship and his Ludship are on a Transatlantic meander to see the Son and heir and his fiddler floozy! To think of all the years I cared for that boy and the promises he made to me, that when he was grown, he and I....... But now look cast aside just like his blue fluffy comfort blanket.

Enough of all that, as the stately pile has been so quiet and the weather quite poor, I have fair excelled myself and the buffet sideboard is groaning with tasty treats of all sorts to suit all palates. A wide array of drinks too as is the rule.

This weeks guest tailcock is the Champagnzeeee, a very refreshing number with a hint of grout and a biscuity undertone.

For the waffle I have:

Blue glass rolling pin (small crack)
4 Lavender tea-lights
2 solar lights that only work in the day
Book of Sudoku (half done)

So a big welcome to members old and new. The Butler will take your coats, indeed be wary, he may take anything.

[vallaw]

Good evening ma'am. Please accept my contribution to the whiffle - or if you prefer you can add it to the buffet - a baker's dozen home-made bread rolls and some home-made cottage cheese (if you don't like the mould you can take it out)
Last time I tried that tailcock I swear it affected my DNA so if it's all the same to you I'll stick to the red wine.

[Mamyalynne]

No problem at all, do help yourself as Butling does seem to have begun yet.

[giveup]

Good evening everyone,What a Day, can I have a large tailcock without ice please and something to nibble. For the waffle I have a box of groceries not too far out of date and a directors chair(needs attention).

[vallaw]

Oh have just remembered my other piffle prize - bottle of shower gel (birthday hint)

[puzzled54]

I seem to be at a loose end tonight and could do with some lavender tea lights. In return, I could offer a useful pot (slightly cracked) - the pot that is, not me.

[Mamyalynne]

What wonderful offerings you bring, all glasses are filled, cheers to all and do enjoy the delicacies.

[DTCwordfan]

hallo Mamya, custodian of the celebral, angelical castle - have you found her Ladyship's sex room yet?

A Champagnzeeee, especially if it is from the thick glass bouteille de Monsieur Heidsieck, (the bottle without the finger V in its base) would indeed be most palatable.

For the Taffle, I thought we would celebrate the gold of our skulling boys and girls on the black waters of Slobenia.

So here we go:

* one leg of Steve Redgrave's shorts
* one hore from the women's boat - of your choice
* one rollock, broken
* one 'udder: well thats what they called the one of the rear of the canoe
* James Cragnell's sweaty t-shirt "I like a good row with my GF"
* Sir Chris Hoy's broken training bike
* The Cambridge University boat that sank in 1978 (cracked)
* One burnt down boat shed from Isis
* Amy Williams panties from her Vancouver run
* Gillian Cooke's split bobsleigh suit from Vancouver - recall this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4sm99V3RJ8

she should stick to rowing.......

[polar-bear]

Good evening All, For the waffle I have some half eaten Cadburys mini rolls (milk chocolate). Half eaten because I am on a diet. I'd love a tailcock.

[Mamyalynne]

I say DT a veritable plethora of sporting prizes, I could do with a new shorts leg. The Champagnzeee is of course of the very best cru.

I do not venture into Miladies 'locked' room, have my own boudoir over the scullery, is cosy up there.

[DaisyNonna]

Evening people. For the rifle I have: a jar of mint humbugs, three Christmas crackers and a pink Pakamac. Would adore a Chamwhatsit. Anybody here to hang up my besom? Don't want it trampled.

[albaqwerty]

A very good evening to one and all. If I may, I've brought Mr Alba along (well, I couldn't really leave him chatting the gnomes up)

For the riffle I can offer a half-sooked gobstopper

Not to be outdone, Mr A is offer a sea-trout head and it's gubbings

I do dust him down occasionally :)

[DTCwordfan]

Rowing Verse:

A four that was racing the head
discovered their cox'n was dead
so to speed up their ride
dumped him over the side
and finished it coxless instead
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------

An AB sculler who rowed out of Vesper
had been seen in the showers to have chest hair.
"the steroids, you see,
they took hold of me"
so the Eds drug police came to arrest her
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------

A woman, a "polar bear ", a novice to crew
was attacked by Vallaw while at 2
as the blade passed her seat
it pulled out both her feet
and ejected her into the chatterbanl blue
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------The
stroke of the Lie-In men's coxless four
found low troll rating a bit of a bore
but by losing the slide
he could rate eighty-five
and on good puzzle days three more
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------A
certain young AB lady from Twickers
when asked why she never wore knickers
said "rowing's no fun
when they ride up my bum
it just makes my technique that bit slicker"
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------Jogger
Jayne approached LRC
and enquired of their membership fee
"all this money you ask
just to sit on my ass?
I'd be better off back at the Lea!"
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------There
once was a Nonna sculler from Thames
who's boat held a mirror and a lens
This curious Club contraption
Required technique adaptation
but at least she could see round the bends
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------There
was a young AB rower from Ealing
who found Boxtops tests quite appealing
but when put in a boat
realised Boxtops doesn't float
as the coach by his side was soon squealing
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------A
well known rower called Trigger
Was proud of his tall and thin figure
That might have been so
But he started to grow
And soon became bigger and bigger
---------------------------------------------
----------------------------------At
trials was an AB scrubber of name
who possesses notorious doc fame
(for he likes sixty-niners)
But if his boat had been a bit finer
He might have been top ten in the AB game

[Lie-in King]

Phew! Grovel, scrape, grovel, scrape... So sorry, Matron - held up by a particularly irritating oik on the telephone.

For the rofl, I have

A just-opened bottle of Raspberry bubble-bath
A once-used loofah
Toy submarine (fires torpedoes...)

It may interest you to know that I partook of my first bath for some 10 years this evening.

I shall down a swift flagon of Champagnzeeee (most intriguing!) & start paying attention soon afterward.

[Lie-in King]

Astonishing, DT! :-)

[albaqwerty]

DT, where do you get them from? rofl

In fact, no it's all right, please don't say:D

Hi Kingy x

[Lie-in King]

Good evening, Miss Alba - please feel free to partake of my tray

[DTCwordfan]

I didn't nail you alba.....here you are:



Alba wore her lycra quite tight
'cause she thought if she did, that she might
Show the AB boys what to touch
But was it was just a bit too much
As they all ran away in a fright

[vallaw]

I fear for our friend - the delirium is taking effect - don't give him a tailcock, it only makes the tremens worse - I deny everything, I wasn't in the boat and anyway she fell out of her own accord . . .

[Mamyalynne]

DT quite amazing and so profound.

Ah there is the Butler and about time too, smell a bit more fragrant at least, now will you hang up some coats and besoms.

[albaqwerty]

Please kingy, not in front of mr Mr Alba, well, all right, go on..... :)

He's inspecting the wine cellar lock as we speak. That Chimpagnazeee is going to my feet, very tasty