abused freind..

[nicolelemley]

ok so my freind often comes to school and she will be sad all day and at lunch she will tell me and my other freind how her moms boyfreind will hit her for no reason..i feel like she is crying out for help but i dont know how to help her other than by telling her how sorry i feel for her..is there anything i can do..??

[Ice.Maiden]

Are you in the UK?

[nicolelemley]

no US.

[Ice.Maiden]

Well hun - I'm sure you have something like "Get Connected" or "Childline" over there - whereby your friend could talk to a counsellor if she wanted to. Pass some details onto your friend, and just tell her that you'll be there for her if she needs you. Hope all goes well!

[Louisa 69]

Hi nicole, i agree with Ice.maiden contact "childline" or is there a teacher at your school that your friend could talk to ?. This really does need to be sorted out and the quicker the better. Has your friend talked to her mum about what's going on ?

Hi Ice :))

[Ice.Maiden]

Hi there Louisa! Thought everyone'd gone to bed hours ago!
Nicole - I think Louisa's right as well. I'm sure your friend could find a sympathetic teacher. Hope things turn out well.x

[Octavius]

Call your State CPS (Child Protection Services)

Unlike the UK, the CPS is state driven rather than national, so you need to look up the CPS for your state and get their number then call.

[nicolelemley]

thank you for all the info! but her mom knows about it she will just let it happen..its not like he will beat her but i guess one time her mom told her to do the dishes and she put some in the dish washer and when they were done she never took them out because she thought she was just supposed to wash them and he threw a plate full of food at her and later on she was talking to herself in her room trying to calm herself down and he threw the door open and that resulted in the door hitting her in the back of the head...if she says anything about it again i will definetly tell her but i am not sure if she wants help..i thought if she really did then she would tell someone and they could do something about it..

[Ice.Maiden]

Even if the door thing was an accident, I think throwing a plate of food at someone constitutes being abusive. Some people don't compalin about being ill-treated, as they fear the consequences - not only to themselves, but to parents or guardians who may also come "in the firing line". Tell your friend that help is available if she needs it, and that as a concerned friend, that's why you're offering some advice.

[Octavius]

Sorry to sound harsh, but there isn't much point in you telling us the details.

If you are pretty certain that abuse is occurring, then I am sure you can contact your CPS anonymously (or a school teacher or your parents?) and they can take the first steps to investigating whether or not there is a case to be followed up.

Maybe she is stuck in a situation and is fearful of contacting or talking to anyone in case the problem escalates. If you definitely feel that she is being abused then help her out.