Look, I'm fed up with writing almost every letter of the alphabet after my name more than once.
I won't tell you what I told the rubber stamp salesman who called at the uni when he asked if I'd like a free rubber stamp with my qualifications on it - we haven't seen him since.
Neither will I tell you what I told the wife last year when she suggested I take an open university degree.
Yes, I am interested in the mysteries of the universe, but I don't consider myself that knowledgable on the subject. The question in the forefont of my mind at the moment is why Him upstairs decided I was to be a professor rather than a binman. Would I have been happier? Who knows.