Kiss at nursery

[wonky]

Hey as i always go on about i look after my nephew half a week every week 1 day out of the few i have him i have to take him to nursery, last week i took him in the nursery nurse shouted hello and asked for a kiss my nephew went over and she kissed him on the lips! she was probably just being friendly but surely this isnt allowed!! if he was mine i would seriously think about having a word with the nursery or even removing him!!

 

What are your thoughts on this what do you think your actions would be?!

x x

[Hgrove]

First of all I would check with the child's mother (your sister?) to see if she has seen this, and if she has an issue with it.  If so, I would just, politely, ask the person in question not to kiss the child on the lips.  Probably best not to try and explain as it gets complicated. I would also suggest to try and do it with a smile, in case the other person feels "under attack".  If the child is happy in the nursery it would be best not to rock the boat as good nurseries are often full.

[mrs.pudding]

It might also depend on how it was done, if you see what I mean.  A sort of silly, noisy smacker of a kiss wouldn't bother me while there are other, creepier sort of kisses that would make me wonder.  How did the child react and were there plenty of people around?  I think, go with your gut feeling and definitely mention it anyway to the child's mother as Hgrove says.

[zgma]

Sounds sweet to me, actually, but it may be bothersome just from the spreading-disease standpoint.  Nurseries are breeding grounds for cold viruses, and they should be following policies to try to not spread colds.  If your nephew's parents are concerned, they should maybe talk to the staff to not do it because of germs - that's what I would do, probably.

[Yinzer]

The nurserie nurse may think nothing of it. For example, my whole family kisses on the lips, aunts cousins parents and siblings regardless of age or gender. When my husband met them he couldn't get over how WEIRD it all was. So just don't make any assumptions about her, and if the simple idea of her not being familiar enough, or spreading germs is what bothers you then yeah, mention it in good humour.

[SGKelloe32]

I have to say, my little girl gives her childminder a kiss when we leave on a night, personally, i can't see the wrong in it, its innocent enough...

[FP]

I think it's so sad that the natural instinct to hug and kiss a young child by someone who knows that child well enough has been condemned and causes concern.

 

I found it so difficult when I worked in a primary school to have to restrain cuddling the little ones when they were upset because it is now not allowed in schools.

 

There are some weird people about, but no more than there ever has been and I think we are unfortunately teaching kids to suspect everyone.

 

However, kissing on the mouth is not really a good idea from the point of view of spreading colds and germs!

 

 

[undercovers]

with all the horror stories you hear about neglected and bullied children at nurseries I would think that one where the child feels comfortable and loved would be a relief - obviously the germ thing would bother me a bit BUT the little ones will be romping all over the place spreading many more germs amongs themselves that a quick lip smacker from the nursers nurse would ever result in... i think you should relax, make sure your nephews happy and be satidfied with that

[stoo_pid]

despite our constant objections my mother always insists on kissing my 4 year old nephew on the lips.  Please don't get me wrong, I think it's essential that children get as much love & affection as possible, including of course, plenty of cuddles & kisses.  But aside from the fact that I feel its inappropriate kissing chilren on the mouth, my poor nephew now sometimes has cold sores - just like his grandmother...  Coincidence?

[wonky]

Thanks all for your answers, i dont think there is anything wrong with kissing on the lips, my nephew and i are so loving towards each other its just when i started my teacher training a few yrs ago they were so strict about not even being able to comfort the child if they fall over so i just wondered if things have changed!!

 

Also the reason for my concerns is he has recently started crying and not wanting to go to nursery i dont know if this in coincidence but i was just a bit worried!! thanks for all reassuring me i will tell his mum about the incident but only so she is aware incase he gets worse about going to nursery!!!

 

Thanks x x

[Octavius]

I know it might sound a bit bizarre to some of you, but I don't think anyone should be kissing children on the lips.  This spreads viruses and illnesses (both ways).  They say cold sores are spread like this and being a long sufferer, I wouldn't dream of kissing even my own child on the lips. 

[madnbad]

i work in a school and that is unacceptable behavour all staff in school are told how to behave with children and kissing is defenatly not on the list as acceptable even if we are asked by the child for a kiss we have to politly decline even giving a child a cuddle in school is frowned uppon speak to the staff and the parent and come to some sort of middle ground