child access

[momcj]

What is a resonable regular access for a non resident father to have with his child?

[sara3]

it's whatever works best for all parties involved.

[S_C]

agreed. especialy as during teh inicial seperation period things can be " up in the air " so to speak so routines can be a bit hit and miss.

but once they have calmned down as sara says the best is whats best for all " flexability on both sides for the sake of the child has its own rewards "

[momcj]

The thing is i dont want to be unreasonable, but then i dont know what is reasonable if you know what i mean! I just wondered what other peoples views of what they would think was acceptable.

[S_C]

yes i get what your saying , however views would personal
for instance
i have 2 brothers both divorced with children.
one see's his child on the weekend every two weeks and is happy with that as is the mother
the other brother see's his child and she stays over 3 nights a week with him , which both parties feel is reasonable

see what im saying ?

[momcj]

Thank you for that. Yeah i mean i know it does vary with different people, but it helps to know what arrangements other people have so i get an idea. it such a complicated thing!

[sara3]

my kids see their dad every day, but that's not workable for some people.

what have you suggested and what does he suggest?

[S_C]

well there are two different arrangements stated : )

however may i take this opertunity to suggest you talk with the farther and find out what kind of access he would like with regards the child/children in question .

for instance he may only want say 8 hours on a sunday currently but when settled and more able may want to have child / children to stay over every other weekend . i know this maybe difficult to communicate as some relationships dont end well " may or may not be the case here , im not asking just to to allow for thsi " but in the long run communication between both parties would make for smoother negociating rregarding what both parties want regarding access.
if it is difficult a third party could be there to help keep it civil.

hope this helps

[karenmac60]

My daughter stays with her dad 2 nights a week - sometimes more during the holidays.