My partner doesn't want a baby, I do.

[gemcoops]

Hi Im 23 next month, my partner is 29. We've been together for nearly 5 years and lived with each other for nearly 3 years. We've travelled. We dont want to get married but I want children and he doesnt know if he does. I feel ready now and want to be young mum, Its really important to me. I dont know what to do. I have nothing without him. Please help. I really dont think he will change his mind over time and I dont want to decide between a baby and him. I love him so much. I dont feel I can hang around and wait, is this wrong?

[PinkFizz]

That is fantastic news!! Oh I am really chuffed to bits for you - have fun trying!! ; )

[sarnieken]

Yaaaay!! :).
Glad to hear it all went well.
Good luck with everything and I hope your babies are healthy and dont cry too much. :)

[jojoe]

Hi, its a horrible situation to be in, its not wrong to feel that you dont feel you can hang around. I think when you get to that point in your life where you feel you have done the majority of things you want to and you feel ready to be a mum thats the right time for you personally, The other half if you is the hard part!
I sort of know where you are coming from Im 26 and have been with my partner for 3 years now and feel I have done everything I want to and feel thus burning desire to be a mum, but my partner dosent feel the same she has said we wil have children but at the moment it isnt the right time for her!
I dont Know what to do really either?
I spose you hav to ask the burning question if they really do not want children at present and you do, will you resent the relationship and them if you stay with them???
GOODLUCK x
let me know how you get on.

[zena00]

word of warning, my partner and i are together 5 yrs, he is 40. i was in the same situation last year, we split up for 1 week and then he said he didnt want to loose me and we could have a baby. A year later we talked about trying and it happened really quickly. When I told him i was pregnant he was shocked and then terrified. He began citing all the reasons why it was not the right time, from him wanting to go abroad, who would walk the dog! less money if i was off work (he earns loads!) possible health reasons, he couldnt cope and i would end up alone with a disabled child! He rounded it off with the final message that he couldnt cope. He is out of the country for the next 3 weeks and i am 5 weeks pregnant. I feel he ruined what should have been the happiest time of my life. He is normally a kind, fun generous thoughtful person and i dont think he is deliberately being mean but i am sooo disappointed in him i dont think i can think of him in the same way ever again.

[gemcoops]

That scares me too. I'm worried about when I have to bring it up again about starting to try for a baby that he will delay it or something. It's been about 2 months since I approached the subject and I'll have to bring it up soon.

Im sorry to hear about your situation Zena00 but who needs a man if he's not 100% devoted to you and your child. I hope everything works out for you. I worry about the money situaion but no one is ever financially ready. The 3 weeks away will give him time to think.

[wisewomen]

Just reading your thread from back in Jan as im in a similar situation that you were in expect I want a baby now and my partner is not sure whether we would be better waiting.

Did you start trying then? Did he keep his word?

[gemcoops]

We are actually going to start trying end of next month. He has really changed over the past few months for the better.

[Alaea]

Have your dreams come true?