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I am really Scared about birth!!

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Bottom | 10:17 Sun 02nd Oct 2005 | Parenting
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I am 22 weeks Pregnant, and really worried about birth. I cried when I had my blood test (the one where they take 6 tubes) I am such a nevours person, I can not even watch the baby programmes how will I take the pain, the thought of tearing being cut and stiches and needles, I dont like people touching me, Please help!!

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I'm not going to lie,  it hurts but you dont think of it as pain, you just want to get on with it.  All I can remember is the pressure and can describe and remember the pain more when I broke my wrist then when I gave birth. I have two children, if it was that bad people wouldn't go on to have more babies.  As soon as they pass you your baby you'll have forgotten all about.

i am the same as you, i ran away when i had to have my blood test!

I know this isnt what you want to hear, but DON'T go for an elective caesarian, they are painful afterward and the recovery is longer.

I would suggest that you have gas and air, wonderful stuff! also listen to your midwife, if you push when they say to and do as they say then your risk of tearing is greatly reduced, my baby was very early and got stuck, i had to have 2 cuts and i didnt feel it! And i was given drugs for the stitches so they were fine to, it wasnt nearly as painful as i expected, and when you see your baby it really does go! (i am also the same with people touching me, but my midwife only ever touched me if she needed to do blood pressure etc, and you wont notice as you will be concentrating on the birth!!

Good luck, in roughly 18 weeks you will be looking at your lovely bubby and wondering what you were so worried about! xx

Yes it does hurt, and I can remember saying when I first went into labour that I'd changed my mind and didn't want a baby at all!.  But as the others have said you are concentrating so much on breathing and how dilated you are etc that your mind isn't on the pain as much as you think and that when you hold your baby you realise that it really was all worth while.  Have a word with your midwife about how scared you are, I'm sure she's come across this before and should be able to reassure you.  Good luck with the rest of the pregnancy.
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Thanks for all your advise I will let you know how it goesxxx
go to anti natal classes . A lot of people may think its a waste of time but you do remember what you have been taught about how to breathe and it helps. The most important thing is to try not to panick and breathe properly to go with the pain and not against it. Just take instructions from your midwife. As others have said if it was really that bad everyone would make sure they only had the one. Immediatley you see your baby the memory of any discomfort will dissapear. All the best

Bottom - it's only natural to be apprehensive when pregnant for the first time.

Try to think of the birth as just one day in your life which will result in the most wonderful achievement for you - becoming a mum.  It's the best feeling in the world.

If it was so terrible I don't think many women would go on to have 2nd, 3rd & 4th children, but of course, we do.

Try to stay relaxed and enjoy your pregnancy. 

Good luck.

Hi Bottom, I tried not to think about the birth too much during my pregnancy but as others have told you on here it is painful, theres no denying it, but baby has to come out! My labour had to be started as my waters had started to break but i didnt have any contractions, and they say the contractions come quicker and stronger when this happens (i only have one child so have nothing to compare it to) The midwife gave me gas and air but i was terrified to be honest when the contractions started coming and the midwife told me to relax but i couldnt, she could see how scared i was and gave me a shot of pethadine. It took about 15/20 mins to kick in but i can tell you it took all the fear away and was the best thing they could have given me i think. Once my daughter was born i had to have a stitch but i they gave me gas and air while they did it and i didnt feel a thing. And i have to be honest none of it was as bad as i thought it would be. Please try not to worry, youre bound to be anxious, but as one reply says on here people go on to have more babies so if it was really that bad people wouldnt do it. Good Luck, im sure it will go well and we're all here to answer any questions if we can

Don't have an answer, but the Very best of luck, and I hope you have a lovely time with your new family.

Bottom - please talk to your midwife or GP - they are very used to this and will be able to help. Also you could try getting in touch with the NCT as they may have a support group near you.  http://www.nctpregnancyandbabycare.com/  Check in your library to see if there are any mother and baby groups - talking to some mums who gave birth recently will reassure you.

It is quite normal to be scared but as soon as you hold your baby you forget about any pain trust me I went on to have 3 children and im the biggest woos around, just enjoy the experience

Bottom - you will be fine and I'm sure you'll amaze yourself with how brave and tough you can be for the sake of your baby; it has to come out sometime!

If you're anything like most of the mums that I know, by the time you get to the end of your pregnancy you will be so big and fed up that you will be desparate to go into labour!

My son was two weeks late and I had to be induced, then went on to have the most horrendous labour ever.  I was hoping to get through on just gas and air, but all it did was make me feel terribly sick.  I had decided during my pregnancy that I did not want pethidine so my only other option was an epidural.  I was told I still had approx. 6 hours before I could push, so I decided to have an epidural, mainly so I still had enough energy for the end.  However, within 20 minutes the baby was on his way out, so I had no time for the epidural and ended up giving birth with no pain relief at all.  It only took 20 minutes to push him out but it seemed like forever and I've never felt pain like it, but I'm now trying for baby number 2, so clearly would be prepared to go through it all again.  When you're thrown in at the deep end you just have to go with it. 

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and don't be scared, giving birth to a baby is the easy part.  Bringing them up is something else entirely!

same, i hate needles. it hurts but worth it, i'd do it all again 10 time over and my baby was just over 12lbs.If i can do it, beleive me anyone can!

hi ive got 3 children and each time i went in2 labour ive thought 'not again'


gas and air helps as it makes u feel light headed but it does not take away the pain unfortunatly nofin does but ive been told epidural does although i did not have this method of pain reliev!


wen the pain gets strng its like a very bad leg cramp except its in ur tummy and 20 times worse, its hard to discrib as the pain jus suddenly goes u tend to forget but i did feel asthough i was bein ripped open but 4evry1 its different thankfully i never tearerd im not gonna lie 2you its a very painful expeiriance thats y its called labour! but i would do it all over again 4the joy at the end is very rewarding!


good luck on the birth of your precious baby xxx

Hi all,il be honest,you wont get a bigger wimp then me,i had a horrible 9 months then my baby was a week late and then i had to be induced,i didnt think the pain would ever end,but the actual labour and giving birth wasnt a awful pain, and as 4 the stitches,i was lying there 4 what seemed like hours while they stitched me back up but i was looking at my baby and they numb the area so you feel nothing anyway,i would go through all that twice if it ment i didnt have to go through the 9 months of prodding and needles ect,anyway i hope it goes well for you its a really exciting thing you go through when you look back on it, honest. gemma

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