I had a gastroscopy today... When I started to take off my shoes to climb....it's a climb for me....onto the bed I was told to keep them on. During the procedure my mind was mulling over all sorts of...
Oh dear! My personal data has been hacked! How traumatic! Now the whole world knows that I prefer Andrex to San Izal, cheese on toast to Dominos pizza, and that my hobby is dressing up in my wife's...
Teacher: If i gave you two apples, and when you get home your girlfriend gave you one, what would you have?
Jimmy: Two apples and a smile on my face !!!...
Hi, How many of you believe in mediums and psychics? Do you believe ghosts exist? How does the Ouija Board work? How can a board with a few numbers and letters call a spirit? Is there life after...
This popped up (ooh matron) when I was searching for something else ... it looked lost in the Old Jokes Home so I thought I'd bring it out for a trot round the park ... How To Shower Like a Woman :...
Finger is 6.5 cm and after looking online it says i should be a size ‘P’ but after looking elsewhere P is 56.3 MM... surly i need 65MM? Making me a W?...
What did the pirate say when he turned 80 years old? Aye matey. So what if I don’t know what Armageddon means? It’s not the end of the world. I’ve been told I’m condescending. (that means I...
Called the vets this morning... "Hello, I need to make an appointment for my pet Ostrich" Vet "Ok what's the problem?" "He's holding his head to one side" Vet "Hmm, maybe neck's weak?" jeez! "Haven't...
I have a friend on Facebook who keeps sharing me useless stuff and I have been able to block some of them by clicking the drop down menu and selecting to see less of the offending posts. But just...
Our NHS is bursting at the seams... Operations are being cancelled, people waiting nearly a day in A&E... Our roads are deteriorating to a point of no return, the pot hole crisis is getting savage and...
Ed and Linda were in their mid 30's and met on a singles cruise and Ed fell head over heels for Linda. When they discovered they lived in the same city, only a few miles apart, Ed was ecstatic. He...