I have to keep looking over this post to see if you are for real
"i should matter more to them now"
Why? you chose to move away. You can't expect to be as close to your friends as you were when you were living near them
"i feel like having a real go"
Why? your friends remembered your birthday. How do you think it will help them remain your friends if you ring them up to tell them off about not sending you a birthday card in time?
Just because you think ahead and plan, dosent mean your friends have to. If you are willing to lose friends over the fact they "only" texted you on your birthday then they cant mean all that much to you in the first place. You can't place your values on other people, nor have such high expectations of them, you'll only be disappointed when it turns out they are not superhuman and can't turn back time.
In my opinion crying for a minute over this is completely over the top, let alone 4 days worth of crying.LET ALONE CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE which is what i presume you mean by "taking pills"
At least be honest with yourself. Is how your feeling ALL about the b/day cards, or is that just the trigger?
Yes, we can't always be thinking of african children but at least some people think about others not just themselves!
"tell me, how should i be feeling"
Why? when people have told you how you should be feeling, you have done nothing but critcize them for it, or accuse them of being nasty