What age does CSA stop?

[Trixey1970]

My daughter is still in further education however I have just been informed by CSA that as she has just turned 19 my payment will stop. Does anyone know if this is correct as I have been giving incorrect advise from the CSA on a few occasions previously and am not sure if this is correct?

Many thanks in adavance. Lisa

[barry1010]

Yes, I put myself through college and university, too, with no help. It all helps to make one independent and self-reliant.

[Trixey1970]

So one of the parents has to keep the child whilst they study and not the other is that what you are saying? So my daughter should help by working as well as studying to pay me rent??? I always thought that no matter what a parent should try their best to give their children the best they can and truely believe that when we bring that child in to this world we should put them 1st..

[Trixey1970]

Tell me Barry... were your parents together when you put yourself through college and uni?

[Beanmistriss]

If parents are still together then its a lot easier. They have paid one rent/mortgage, one lot of bills etc for all those years. When they split up there are then two mortgages etc. It doesn't always work out the way you always planned. At 19 I don't think it would be unreasonable to ask your daughter to contribute to the running of the house. If you choose not to ask her to do that it is your choice. It's not your ex's fault. If it were the other way round would you pay his bills for him?

[Trixey1970]

So when you were 19 you studied and paid your parent rent?

[Beanmistriss]

When I was 17 and 18 I studied, lived at home, worked part time and paid my parents digs. When I was 19 I worked and paid them money. They were together. It taught me to be responsible.

[Trixey1970]

Well my daughter is 19, works 2 jobs to try and keep herself in college and being as when she started college she was too young to get a grant then all of her money goes towards books etc for college. If she starts paying me rent then how will she pay for her books... oh yes... get in to debt! One thing I didn't mention... My ex husband and I both were at college together... unfortunately as I got pregnant due to a burst condom I gave up college and worked to keep him in college and then to pay bacjk his debts. Once the debts got cleared he ******** off for a better lifestyle of partying about town and going on fab holidays!! Meanwhile... here I go back in to debt as due to my lack of a brilliant education I earn 1/3 of what he earn so can't give his kids the lavish lifestyle that he now has... you getting my drift when I get a bit angry at him???

[McNoodle]

...beginning to get a picture of why he left... bet he got some ear ache?

[oldhamfan]

While I am sympathetic to your financial plight it is the Child Support Agency - not the Adult Support Agency. Your daughter is a grown woman.

[Trixey1970]

My children were devastated as well as myself the day their father left... he also chose the perfect time - over Christmas.. My eldest one got hit the worst which is why she is running nearly 2 yrs behind with her deucation... she idolised her dad and even went to live with him for a while however going back to the not wanting the responsibility thing again he sent her back.. When you bring children in to the world they don't stop being your child ever and it should be a parents responsibility to be there for that child..

[bednobs]

i see what you are saying but my point remains that it's not a "childs" right to have holidays provided by their parents (especially adult children!)
if it was i'd be presenting my parents with a bill for my holiday this year

[bednobs]

i see what you are saying but my point remains that it's not a "childs" right to have holidays provided by their parents (especially adult children!)
if it was i'd be presenting my parents with a bill for my holiday this year

[Trixey1970]

Are you real?? I'm sorry... do you have children? Are you a man? Are you my ex husband?

[Beanmistriss]

How rude are you? Only one person has agreed with your point of view. Theres no need to get rude to those who don't. You have no right to have your ex pay your bills. If you decide to support your adult child through college thats your choice. If you dont take rent from her thats your choice. If you decide to pay for her so she doesnt have to take a student loan thats your choice. If you continue to live in a house you say you cant afford thats your choice. You cant make him pay forever for your choices!

[Trixey1970]

Well I must say if you believe that a man can walk out on his family to live a brilliant life and watch his children live in basically poverty which is what he did, then I'm not going to reply to you anymore. I fight to keep a roof over my childrens head every day and have for the 6 years and I will continue to do so because that is what parental responsibility is..

[oldhamfan]

She's not a child, and your husband shouldn't be paying for your adult-daughter's holidays. She is a grown woman and she should be going out to work part-time if you are struggling that much.

Try not to be so bitter and bring your divorce into it. The fact is she's an adult and should be working if you are struggling to support her.

Good luck.

[Trixey1970]

This is not about wanting money from him to take them away on holidays... my kids haven't been away on holidays for 5 yrs now so kind of dont expect it now... it does upset them to see their dad go away all the time though.. My house is a small 3 bedroom house (actually 2 bedrooms and a box room) so if I sell it will not have a house big enough to for all 3 of us.. My daughter does have a part time job but that money is needed for her college supplies which seem to be needed regularly.. My bitterness is only because my ex has at times watched us really have to struggle and not given a damn about it.. He didn't leave just me in the lurch... he left his children too..

[kitmarshall]

im sorry to read about your difficulties and mistrust of the csa.i understand exactly how unfair csa can be.however im on the other side of the coin.im strugglin to keep a roof over my head whilst payin a 3rd of my wage (the old system of assesment that ended 5 yrs ago) to support a one night stand and her habit.wouldnt you agree the csa and its pathetic methods/rules have caused so much bitterness and hatred between ex couples/partners? and its child who suffers the most.

[Trixey1970]

I do sympathise with your predicament but not with my ex.. he is on good pay and chooses to spend his money on himself and his girlfriend and watches whilst his kids go without which is hard on them and hard on me as I feel that I've let them down cos I can't give them the same as their friends get.. I truely am trying my best to give them security and a quality of life - the life I hoped to give them when I brought them in to the world. I was brought up having nothing from a broken home and really hoped for better for my kids but it's soo hard..