Question Author
gness, I meant to comment on your post earlier. I am sorry you have had to endure such a dreadful experience and can empathise with your feelings regarding that man's illness and subsequent death.
I have met many rape victims and a lot feel like you. Some, however, carry a great burden of guilt that their attacker is in prison or has been in prison, especially when that attacker is a relative. I find it hard to comprehend but I do understand that that burden would be much worse if their attacker died because of the rape, whether by choice or death penalty.
I think that maybe anger is a healthier attitude than guilt in the case of rape victims. I hope you have had all the support available to you and that it has helped.