UK Toddler abducted....

[spaced]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/leicestersh ire/6623127.stm

I dont feel sorry for the parents. I feel sorry for the child. Who in their right mind would leave such a young child on their own in a hotel, regardless of checking on them every 30 mins.

in minutess you could die from smoke inhalation, it takes seconds for as child to eat or drink something poisonous, seconds for them to hurt themselves, cut themselevs and bleed to death in 30 mins.

I think it's outragious. Why leave the child in the room, while you have dinner. terrible. I have no sympathy. Poor child.

[cardi88]

i had people trying to check in to my hotel today that had a 2 yr old and a baby and wanted to check that their baby monitor worked from their room (in a different building to the main public area) to the bar. I expalined that we wouldnt allow children left unatended in a room, the worst thing was that the possibility of the monitor not working didnt really affect their plans - then i heard this story on the radio and was so glad i asked them to leave.

[NiceCupOfTea]

Having a child go missing is the absolute ultimate nightmare of any parent. It happens, no matter what precautions people take, and afterwards there is only the guilt of 'what if....'. Even if you've stayed with your child non stop but cot death happens 'what if....'. If you've let your child out to play in the garden with a fence and locked gate with their friends but they've escaped for a spy game or whatever 'what if....?.

Please don't say they were bad parents. I don't know the full story. We come across bad parents in my job all the time, and their kids aren't abducted, murdered or missing.

It's an evil, nasty lottery. If someone goes looking for a child to abduct they'll find one and we need to face that fact.

I am a fully aware parent, but I fear constantly - even to the extent that I am aware that someone could boink me over the head while I walked her to nursery, knock me out and abduct her.

I'm fairly paranoid, and I know that's not healthy. But I also know it only takes a second. However, on holiday I would hope my child was safe. I'm thinking of scenarios where I've sat on the balcony in my appartment. Any one could have opened the door and abducted my child. I really do check every few minutes, but that's all it takes.

[anotheoldgit]

In minutes you could die from smoke inhalation, it takes seconds for as child to eat or drink something poisonous, seconds for them to hurt themselves, cut themselevs and bleed to death in 30 mins.

Do you spaced, spend every second, every minute, every hour,--------- by your child's side (if you have any) watching over them? Even when you have put them to bed for the night?

This would of course be the only safe way to make sure nothing untoward happened to them, but we all know this isn't possible.

[smudge]

Thought I'd pop in to read the latest news on AB.

Like everyone else & as a mother & grandmother, I haven't stopped thinking about the disappearance of this little girl. God only knows what must be going through her parents minds too.

Just found this latest snippet of news at just after midday today:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles /news/news.html?in_article_id=452633&in_page_i d=1770

If someone is holding her, please let her be found safe & well....

[beryllium]

Please let her be found safe.

The parents? I'm shocked that they thought leaving a 3 year old and her twin baby siblings alone, asleep and checking on them every half hour was a good plan.
For instance. A 3 year old can wake up at any time, in a strange bed to her in this particular case maybe....possibly a bit frightened... possibly just needing a drink.... possibly just wanting. She's calling out for mum and dad, and they dont come to her.
She gets out of bed to look for them. They're not there so she wanders off, getting out of the room to look for them.

In this case she's been snatched.

Do you think they would leave their children alone in England whilst they just pop out to a close by restaurant and not bother with a baby sitter then? just popping in to check?

Would these parents be in trouble with social services et al? if it had happened here?

Please let her be found safe. As for the parents? their stupidity and sheer assumption that leaving children alone is ok? at night in a strange country?......

I feel angry at them.

Please let her be safe.........

[Goodsoulette]

I entirely agree with Beryl. They were 40 yards away but their apartment was invisible to them.

Noone is blaming them for what happened as child abduction should have been the last of their worries. Fire, ill health, nightmares, choking, fitting and a whole manner of other things would have been crossing my mind before I locked my boys in an apartment vefore I went off to dinner. All things which could kill or be utterly distressing for a child to wake up and find no parents with them.

However as a single, nonprofessional parent I am sure the Headlines would have been a bit different had I done something similar with the same outcome.

[jkelly24]

I think it is terrible these children were left alone simply so thier parents could 'dine out'. I believe at least one of the parents was a doctor. Doctors are the first people to report any signs of neglect of a child, it just shows some of them are no better themselves!

[netibiza]

I've heard conflicting stories - were they 40 m or 200 m away from the apartment - not that it matters, but 40m is just at the end of my garden and really is no distance at all, I wonder would I have been tempted to do the same, if I could have seen doors and windows? Would hope not.

[Oneeyedvic]

Whilst this is an emotive subject, I believe that too much blame is being put on the parents.

This is one of those rare times that I absolutely agree with anotheoldgit.

Lets not forget this family: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tyne/619771 8.stm who were simply in another room when their daughter was snatched.

It is simply impossible to watch your children all the time. Personally, I don't actually think that what they did was that bad - and bear in mind that most UK hotels offer baby listening services.

[bensmum]

How many times have any of us said "I wish I had or hadn't done so and so..."? This is an extreme case and is surely every parent's worse nightmare so these people need support at the moment. Hopefully everything will work out but I'm sure that the parents don't need reminding of their shortcomings at the moment.

[lou4]

i hope the girl is found safe and sound.
But if they would leave them alone in a strange country would they leave them alone in this country?

[tradey]

i really hope shes found safe,my god what a terrible thing this is,but i still cant understand how any parent would even think of leaving their kids alone in a room,so what if the door was locked it still shouldnt have happened and they shouldnt have left them in there alone.it only takes a second for a child to go missing.

[netibiza]

It's all very well saying don't blame the parents,. who else is there to blame? Checking on them every 30mins wasn't good enough. It just proves that leaving these children alone was WRONG. The worst happened.

[Oneeyedvic]

"It's all very well saying don't blame the parents,. who else is there to blame?"

Well you could try blaming the person who kidnapped the child.

As has been ascertained, 5 minutes is too long to leave a child.

I assume that you sleep with your child, go to school with your child and even watch while they are in the toilet?

[netibiza]

Please don't be stupid! If the parents hadn't left the children unattended it would not have happened. And yes I was very careful with my child!! I most certainly went with her to public toilets. The abductor could not have abducted the child had there been proper supervison, and when we went on holidays we never left our child unsupervised, so yes I do blame the parents, although I feel very sorry for their grief.

[Oneeyedvic]

So according to you netibiza, parents should never leave their children alone. I assume that you therefore believe that any hotel that offers a baby listening service (and there are over 11 million pages on a google search) are all immoral and wrong.

[pastafreak]

From what I have read, what the parents did was not so very unsual for this type of resort. they are like self-contained environments with a very strong 'illusion' of safety. In that sort of environment there is no reason to feel threatened or to be suspicious. they probably felt safer there than they would here in England.....I doubt Portugal has the same level of crime as we do here-on that basis who can blame them. They were not the first to do what they did nor will they be the last. ...they were just very,very unlikely.

[sifellis]

I've spoke with friends and family around the table about this subject and we are all in agreement that the people to blame are the parents.

If you want to be on holiday without having to look after children then don't take them. I have no sympathy for the parents whatsoever.


That is all i have to say on the matter.

[xanderma]

oneeyedvic, obviously no one stays with their child 24 / 7, that's just being silly, but there is a huge difference between being in the next room, where the child can find you whenever s/he needs you, or leaving your child in school where the staff is in loco parentis, and leaving your children alone in a strange place while you enjoy a meal.

These parents obviously do not deserve what has happened to them, but I fail to see how anyone here can condone or defend or justify what they did - no matter what the circumstances, how safe they felt, what baby-listening services were available (althoug the news reports that they were not using any such service) they left their children ALONE.

[Oneeyedvic]

xanderma If the child had wandered off by herslef then fair enough, your argument stacks up. These people were around 50 yards away from where the child was. People have bigger back gardens that this.

Do you think it terrible if someone puts their girl in a bedroom and then sits it the back garden? - because that is the equivalent.

This girl did not wander off - she was kidnapped by people who jimmied the door.

I can't believe that the majority of people see this as the parents fault.