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Patsy33

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nicebloke1
Lidl have a 4 wick Xmas candle for sale. It weighs in at 4.5 kilos, 20cm across, 10 deep. Price £24.99.
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Charles659
Todays Dingbat ✔️     SPOUSE Any ideas?    Will post answer tomorrow. 
cheers.  
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Hazlinny
☘ 🎈 Sending you Good Wishes on your birthday ...  hope you will have an enjoyable day whatever it brings  ...  may the luck of the Irish be with... ...
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Patsy33
My wife stormed out of the house due to my obsession with the Weather Forcast,  I haven't the Foggiest where she's gone.
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Kogvos
5d. Panted loudly when depressed (4) ?L?E. 19d. Against false-sounding imitation that's out of control (4) ?A?C? Thanks
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Bernie
12/11a. Like a tsunami at sea, see deeper goings on,  proverbiallyin there(5,6)?t?l  waters. 27d. Beetles cavern? What's this you might hear then?(4)l?i? Many thanks 
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Patsy33

I'll start us off:- Awl or Nothing- Small Faces
Hammer to Fall- Queen.
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nicebloke1
How much do the girls on AB spend on a visit to the hairdressers, in an attempt to keep on looking glamorous. Or have you given up hope. #:▪︎)
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piggynose
https://youtube.com/shorts/BjDoaY35qxU?si=tMP1cbN8ewp2m9jn Did this make you giggle? 😂  ...
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nicebloke1
Without anything for the weekend, how much do you pay the barber for your haircut. It dont affect me because I've been shaving my own for yonks. Happen to look at a price list yesterday and was... ...
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naomi24
Following the excellent ITV drama, a documentary with the real Delia, the woman who survived a vicious attack by her serial killer boyfriend.  Highly recommended.
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Rondy
I was standing in the queue in Aldi earlier and a voice announced "Checkout no.5 please."
I thought, I've seen better than her. ___ Did you hear about the cannibal spider that ate his uncle’s wife?... ...
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Canary42
"My husband and I went through the McDonald's driveway window and I gave the cashier a £5 note. Our total was £4.25, so I also handed her 25p. She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I... ...
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naomi24
Collecting people from the airport, we parked late at night at the nearby McDonald's.  It being very dark, husband got out of the car to read parking sign - 60 minutes free if using the facilities... ...
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Canary42
Two I recently noticed locally :- Women's clothing =  Sweaty Betty Men's barber = Rusty Razor
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davebro3
A guy I knew back in 80s was an out and out mean thief. He was convicted of a minor crime in Scotland (stealing a boat) and later stole from several walking club members - including myself - who... ...
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Patsy33
I've just gone on the Adam Ant diet. It's dead easy; Don't Chew Ever 👍
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Patsy33
I said to the Doctor, "When l move my leg it makes a Mooing noise". He replied,"It sounds like a Calf injury"
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Ripper
The answer has an animal in it. i.e. the winged feathered creature and a soft mass of tissue in the head =Bird Brain.      Sausages cooked in batter (one word)   Snob monkey uses questionable... ...
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bluebell56
These last two have stumped me. Answers contain the letters 'ite'. The answers are in alphaetic order so they are both beginning with c,d or e. They are No.5 Means of determining what a thing... ...

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