A little old lady shaking violently as she walks into the pharmacy and asks the sales person"do you sell vibraters"surprised by her request the sales person says "yes" The little old lady said"Well...
A little old lady answered a knock on the door only to be confronted by a young man carrying a vacuum cleaner."good morning madam"said the young man"if I could have a few minutes of your time I would...
In prison you spend majority of time in an 8x10 cell In work you spend majority of time at a 6x8 desk In prison you get 3 meals a day At work you get a break for a meal and you don't have to pay for...
A little boy walks into his parents room to see his mum on top of his dad bouncing up and down.The mum sees her son and quickly dismounts worried about what her son had seen.She dresses quickly and...
It seems to me the basic conflict betwen men and woman sexually is that men are like firemen.To men sex is an emergengy and no matter what we are doing we can be ready in two minutes.Woman are on fire...
After being snowbound for 2 weeeks a seattle man bound for miami beach where he was to meet his wife the next day at the end of her business trip to Minneoaplis.They were looking forward to some nice...
My grandson was 4 end of jan.For few months now all has been well with toilet .But a few times been caught just in the act of haveing a poo and when you say "what you doing "he says "nothing "We can't...
A man and his wife are sound asleep when the phone rings.The man picks up phone and listens for a second and says "how the hell would I know you idiot i'm not the weatherman"and slammed the phone...
A young girl gets married and after a few days her mother visits and is shocked to see her daughter naked."what are you doing "she said."Mum it's my love dress".She said "I will come back in a few...
TO MUMMY AND DADDY Sometimes you get discouraged because I am very small, And always leave my fingerprints on furniture and walls But every day i'm growing I'll be grown up one day,And all those tiny...
Woman recently lost her husband and had him cremated and brought his ashes home.She poured him on the garden table talking to him she said "Irvine you know that fur coat you promised me,I bought it...
During monthly visits to the barbers man asks how to treat increasing baldness.The barber said "best thing to do is come across the female juices"But you are balder than I am "said the customer."True"...
A retired gent went to the social security to apply for social security.After waiting a long time he gets to the counter.The woman asks him for his driving licience and he looked in his pockets and...
There was a couple been married 20 years and every time they made love husband insisted turning out the light.Well after 20 years wife felt this was ridiculous.She figured she could break him out of...
Skinny white man goes into lift and looks at the huge black man who says"before you ask7 ft tall,350lbs,20" dick and my balls weigh 3lbeach,Turner Brown.White guy faints ,when he comes too he asks the...
A family are driving behind a dust cart when a dildo flew out and hit there windscreen.The mother said to her young daughter"that was a big insect"to which the girl replied"Iam surprised it can fly...
What's the difference between a muslim and E.T. E.T looked better 'smelt better ,learn't english didn't claim benifits had his own bike and wanted to go home.
Man wearing oxygen mask mumbles "nurse are my testicles black"Nurse raises his gown holds his man hood in one hand his testiciles in the other and says"There is nothing wrong with them sir"Man pulls...
Started a new job at the supermarket this morning and I have been sacked already.I was on wines and spirits and some **** asked me"can you recommend a good port" I said "Yes Dover now f*** off.
