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Hospital Bed At Home

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Thisoldbird | 04:38 Wed 11th May 2022 | Body & Soul
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It's looking like we may have to have a hospital bed at home when my husband is discharged from hospital.

We already changed from double to singles which is fine but they are both against a wall. Hospital bed will need to allow nurses/ carers to use both side of bed..our second very tiny bedroom is already crammed with other equipment he needs.

Before anyone down sizes make sure you keep this sort of situation in mind.
At this rate I'll be sleeping in the shed!!
I'm normally such an organised person I'm hating this disruption.
The other option is go into care. I really haven't the heart to do that to him. It's like turning someone out of there home.

This isnt a question just me rambling on a sleepless night of worry.

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It is amazing what the human body is capable of when the focus is caring for a loved one, old bird. It is obvious from what you have written that you care so much for your OH and I feel that with sufficient help and support you will cope. Let those who will be calling into your home do as much as they can to ease your work load. Thank goodness for the help of nice...
10:43 Thu 12th May 2022
Night night x
Hi C, I’ve been checking like you for a post from TOB. I hope things have improved for her and her husband .
Question Author
Aww thank you so much for looking out for me.

Not much has changed for my little man..I don't want to bore you constantly going on
about him when I read others with troubled times too.
This week his diet has been interesting.
After giving a list of foods he can eat, last weekend the chef requested a chat. The nicest man who understood my husbands swallowing issues and how the throat functions. As my husband has full
capacity he is able to tell them his choice from each days menu.

On Monday he produced a very nice meal of potatoe peas and cabbage mixed to the acceptable texture with finely ground mince in a little gravy. We had previously discussed mixing the veg. Ice cream for dessert.
Tuesdays meal surprised me as it was delivered whole..whole scampi chips and peas. He had chosen the menu as something he would enjoy in times past. I guessed rightly as it happened, chef wasn't on that day.
Yesterdays meal was flaked poached salmon and a little chopped egg in a sause with mashed potatoe and broccoli, perfect texture. The patient ate half of the very small portion. Excellent for him. Dessert was strawberry mousse with a strawberry sauce.again he ate half.
Chef came to the room later to check if it was ok..today he came to the room again. Discussed tomorrows menu..that's what I call service.
Although he knows he isn't going to get better, my poorly boy is in bed 24/7 hasn't seen himself in a mirror for at least 2 months. He asks me daily, do I look ok...I tell him you look fine...his little face is sunken beneath his cheek ones, eyes also sunken and temples the same. His wrist I can almost get my hand round. A sad looking sight. Visiting him daily as I do, I see such a frail old chap.

After 63 yrs 6 months 24 days he still tells me several times a day..I love you dear..he thanks me for visiting.

Such a sweet caring man always.. nite nite and thank you again. Xx

You are not boring us at all, please don’t feel that . Great work from the chef. I wondered if you got his pain relief sorted.
I hope you are having some rest between visits.
Prayers and best wishes to you both . Good night . Anne .
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Today was rather difficult to cope and understand.

My little man was very agitated from the minute I walked in the door. A carer was just leaving but I could see my husband wasnt himself. He told me his back pain was so bad he would like some pain relief.i checked with staff to find he had it half hour previous. Lunch arrived but he struggled to eat just a couple of bites from the tip of a teaspoon. All the times saying help me please somebody help me..I again went to ask had he really had it as he seemed to still be in pain. Assured he had. Nurse said they have another pain relief he can take along side of Morphine.
While waiting for it to be arranged Chef came again to check on food consistency. No complaints there he is very considerate man.

Nurse gave further medication. Still he couldn't settle. My niece arrived to take me home before popping back to sit with her special uncle.
She rang me after she arrived home to tell me how agitated he was throughout her long visit. Apparently he had a nightmare last night, nurse sat with him a while.
Today's behaviour is so out of character I'm wondering what else going on with him.
I told him if he ever wanted to talk to me, at any hour to call me. I don't know what else I can do for him.. when checking on my next visit he wants exact timing..i treasure him all i can..xx
Hi, how have things been the last few days TOB ? I hope your OH is more settled than the last time we read your post. Keep us posted if you have time.
Take care . Anne .
old bird - sorry haven't been on with you but believe it or not I think of you and your hubby.

It is so lovely to see two people so in love after so many years and still caring for each as well as can be expected.

am glad you have relatives to help you on your journey. nothing as bad as literally as having nobody. your niece seems to be a good kind girl and we need them all.

you try and do your best for your wee hubby as you seem to be doing so God be with you and give your strength to go on.

bye for now and sorry for the late post.
Question Author
Todays visit was full of mixed emotions. Not long after I arrived a GP and duty nurse came into the room. GP asked a few questions as he hadn't met my husband before.
He then asked, do you want to be taken to hospital 'when the time comes'..we both agreed to remain at the home. GP said they will make sure he is kept comfortable.

That took us both by surprise.. my dear man whispered, I've not got long now. I assured him, however long or short I will still be by his side. We will do as we always did..together.

The depression, anxiety, restlessness, shortness of breath, all signs the body is entering into its final stages.
I feel like I'm having a bad dream.

Thankfully he is getting the best care possible.

Night night x

TOB, I think you are * having a bad dream* only it’s real. Please inform staff if the boy is uncomfortable, is in pain, or distressed.
I’m pleased you both have decided to stay in the nursing home, you don’t want to be transferring to a strange place. I wonder if you are having any rest, eating/ drinking well. Prayers continue. Take care Anne .
old bird - it brings memories to me that I had an aunt and uncle and they never ever called each his other their names, it was always Boy, or Girl. In the beginning it was unusual to hear since they were in their late 80s but it was terms of endearment

Glad boy is in a good place with good care - jennyjoan
I've finally discovered to type a decent reply I've got be on my pc and not my phone. :-) This reply is late.

I hope he is being kept comfortable at the very least.

Please look after yourself too OB, thinking of you and keeping you in my thoughts. Take care xxxx
Hello my friend, sorry I have been off line. I still pray and think of you both throughout the days and nights. You are doing well to be with your beloved as much as you are and I am sure he appreciates so much your attention and company. All this comes with its own cost but I know you will cope somehow. As ever I send you my warmest wishes and love x
I’m sure TOB will be delighted to see you return. I hope everything is ok for you choux .
TOB, please be careful in this heatwave. I’m sure your husband will be kept comfortable and cool .
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Oh Hello.. yes am very pleased to see you posting Choux, to know your ok. I hope your coping too.

I'm still daily visiting. My little man still hangs on, how I don't know. Barely a morsel of food passes his lips..he sips drink tho.
The pain relief makes him sleepy. Today his breathing is erratic..voice barely audible..last week a GP came to ask if 'when the time comes' would he prefer to be on hospital or remain here at the care home. Here it will be..we can't praise the staff high enough..everyone is so caring.

Take care and keep well. X


I have caught up on your recent posts, old bird, and am relieved to read that the staff taking care of the boy are doing so very well, it must make all the difference to you both. The pain management sounds absolutely adequate which must be a huge reassurance for you. Bless him for the way he is coping. I imagine the time you spend together when he is able to speak mean the world to both of you. Pure love. x
thinking of you oldbird - every thing that happens for you - an eat, a sip - just anything makes a visit worthwhile.

I know Choux is coming through his/her problems but hope you two are doing ok.

I am now trying to cope with osteoporarthritis (sp) but the incredible pain is - in the morning - one leg does not move and whilst in bed you panic a little bit but if I move gently things start to move.

I hope you and oldbird get better soon. xx
Good morning dear friend. Hope you are able to keep cool in this weather and taking care of yourself. Thinking of you and praying you can chat with your dear husband today. x
You must be shattered, dear lady. Get some rest and take care.
Night night. x
As ever, night night. x
Question Author
Thank you. I've not forgotten you all and your comforting words.

As I write this I am sitting beside his bed..where I will remind all night.the ended my beloveds life is drawing close..
Xx

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