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The Answer!
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Policy Regarding Recruiting New Sanctuarians:
I am under the impression that some among us are insistent upon maintaining the privacy (however illusory) of this thread. The relative security provided here to reveal personal details and feeling should imo continue to be honoured. With this in mind may I suggest the following method for introducing new candidates for consideration:
To introduce a new candidate/s for consideration, post a link to another thread of your choosing where existing 'members' are invited to meet, get to know and possibly consider introduction to this thread.
All decisions regarding new recruitments should require unanimous agreement without exception or coercion.
I do not aspire to ownership nor do I intend to dictate policy on this or any thread but I am, for my own part, committed to respecting the 'privacy' and feelings of everyone here . . . not that I am without my own faults in this regard.
I am under the impression that some among us are insistent upon maintaining the privacy (however illusory) of this thread. The relative security provided here to reveal personal details and feeling should imo continue to be honoured. With this in mind may I suggest the following method for introducing new candidates for consideration:
To introduce a new candidate/s for consideration, post a link to another thread of your choosing where existing 'members' are invited to meet, get to know and possibly consider introduction to this thread.
All decisions regarding new recruitments should require unanimous agreement without exception or coercion.
I do not aspire to ownership nor do I intend to dictate policy on this or any thread but I am, for my own part, committed to respecting the 'privacy' and feelings of everyone here . . . not that I am without my own faults in this regard.
I don't mind new recruits at all as long as we're all agreed... I have an uncompromising stance on a couple of members of AB and that will not change. If they're invited I will never contribute another word. However, I suspect they were never on the list anyway! ;0) So sure, throw some suggestions out there.
Remember my friend who's mother died? Well he got absolutely tanked on Friday (he's generally tea total) and was very insulting towards me and another mutual friend of ours.. sent us a text saying 'I'm fine, thanks for asking recently,' I'd previously sent him a few random texts without response and natually assumed he wanted alone time. In fairness he did apologise for this a bit later after I pointed out he was taking the pish (I did not use those exact words!) However, a lot later on he then proceeded to bombard us both with texts regarding no one giving an Eff word etc... And his thoughts were really rather maudlin to say the least. Me being me, you can imagine I was less than impressed with this. I did try to call but he rejected it. I sent him a text Saturday afternoon to check he was still breathing (and again, I did not use those words!) and got back something along the lines of him being around and nothing more. I just responded saying I was at least pleased to hear that.
Remember my friend who's mother died? Well he got absolutely tanked on Friday (he's generally tea total) and was very insulting towards me and another mutual friend of ours.. sent us a text saying 'I'm fine, thanks for asking recently,' I'd previously sent him a few random texts without response and natually assumed he wanted alone time. In fairness he did apologise for this a bit later after I pointed out he was taking the pish (I did not use those exact words!) However, a lot later on he then proceeded to bombard us both with texts regarding no one giving an Eff word etc... And his thoughts were really rather maudlin to say the least. Me being me, you can imagine I was less than impressed with this. I did try to call but he rejected it. I sent him a text Saturday afternoon to check he was still breathing (and again, I did not use those words!) and got back something along the lines of him being around and nothing more. I just responded saying I was at least pleased to hear that.
I've had a chat with our mutual friend who was a lot kinder than me and continued to text/attemt to call him until she got a response and indeed a bit more of a dialogue from him. As far as I'm concerned (I've said the same to her) he can go whistle... I'm not a punch bag, I didn't deserve any of that and he owes me an apology, I don't care what he's going through, it's no excuse for hurting my feelings when all I've done is be there for him. I feel safe in the knowledge that our mutual friend will still be there to support him and I'm sure as hell not going out of my way to get back in touch to be sh@t on again (refer to 'go whistle' comment).
Am I being stubbon and/or too harsh?
Am I being stubbon and/or too harsh?
I have compassion for those who were mistreated as children and are making genuine attempts to deal with and overcome such abuse to the extent they are able to do this. But my compassion quickly evaporates when the best they have managed is to make it a point to fully deserve the worst of the cards life has dealt them.
I believe one of the most rewarding and 'selfish' of enterprises is when we can assist another human being whose show of appreciation need be nothing more than an acknowledge of their recognition that we care. I do not believe it is possible to be of value to another without receiving equal compensation in return.
Emotional blackmail is another kidnapper I refuse to pay ransom to. No guilt deserved has ever been earned by virtue of birth nor of personal good fortune. Those who attempt to hold another�s happiness hostage have forfeited their own right to exist and thwarted their own ability to find any kind of happiness not in the guise of an imposter. The value of inheritance rests on an heirs capacity to prove themselves� ultimately equal to that which they inherited thereby demonstrating the bequeathers� own good judgment and ability to make a wise investment.
I regret any bad investments you have make in your attempts to promote the cause of humanity but much more than this I have confidence in your ability to shrug off the bitterness that so often accompanies the learning of one of life�s most challenging lessons, to keep in mind that there is no one more worthy of that which you desire to give than the giver.
I believe one of the most rewarding and 'selfish' of enterprises is when we can assist another human being whose show of appreciation need be nothing more than an acknowledge of their recognition that we care. I do not believe it is possible to be of value to another without receiving equal compensation in return.
Emotional blackmail is another kidnapper I refuse to pay ransom to. No guilt deserved has ever been earned by virtue of birth nor of personal good fortune. Those who attempt to hold another�s happiness hostage have forfeited their own right to exist and thwarted their own ability to find any kind of happiness not in the guise of an imposter. The value of inheritance rests on an heirs capacity to prove themselves� ultimately equal to that which they inherited thereby demonstrating the bequeathers� own good judgment and ability to make a wise investment.
I regret any bad investments you have make in your attempts to promote the cause of humanity but much more than this I have confidence in your ability to shrug off the bitterness that so often accompanies the learning of one of life�s most challenging lessons, to keep in mind that there is no one more worthy of that which you desire to give than the giver.
Gosh, a lot to catch up with.
Theland, you were upset by the idea that Jesus may have been married. The question was what difference would that make to you?
I'm very sorry your son is suffering, but I have to ask why he's in so much pain? That can't be necessary in this day and age. Surely he's on medication to control it? Perhaps it needs to be re-assessed.
Please don't get me hair curlers. I can't imagine anything worse! A bottle of Chanel Chance would be welcome though. ;o)
With regard to inviting new members, I agree with Starman and China. Like China, at the appearance of certain individuals, I'd be furiously pedalling my bike, never to return. However, I'm willing to consider nominations.
China, not quite as comprehensive as Starman's answer, but suffice to say I know the feeling - and I don't blame you one bit. Something similar has happened to me - more than once - and yes, it's hurtful - very hurtful. You cared when your friend needed help, but it seems he's a 'user' who clearly doesn't care for you. Learn the lesson, put the past behind you, and don't look back. Move on, China.
(I've no doubt that, like me, you'll come across plenty more 'lame ducks' in the future - and you'll help them - but perhaps you'll be a little more wary next time, and maybe with the lesson learnt, a little more reluctant to give quite so much). :o)
Theland, you were upset by the idea that Jesus may have been married. The question was what difference would that make to you?
I'm very sorry your son is suffering, but I have to ask why he's in so much pain? That can't be necessary in this day and age. Surely he's on medication to control it? Perhaps it needs to be re-assessed.
Please don't get me hair curlers. I can't imagine anything worse! A bottle of Chanel Chance would be welcome though. ;o)
With regard to inviting new members, I agree with Starman and China. Like China, at the appearance of certain individuals, I'd be furiously pedalling my bike, never to return. However, I'm willing to consider nominations.
China, not quite as comprehensive as Starman's answer, but suffice to say I know the feeling - and I don't blame you one bit. Something similar has happened to me - more than once - and yes, it's hurtful - very hurtful. You cared when your friend needed help, but it seems he's a 'user' who clearly doesn't care for you. Learn the lesson, put the past behind you, and don't look back. Move on, China.
(I've no doubt that, like me, you'll come across plenty more 'lame ducks' in the future - and you'll help them - but perhaps you'll be a little more wary next time, and maybe with the lesson learnt, a little more reluctant to give quite so much). :o)
Ah, after an experience like that, no surprise there. Although Starman thinks I am heading down a dark path, I know that some things are unshruggable. (Oops ... I've made up another word! Maybe I should consider writing a new dictionary). Come on China, as the eternal optimist, I've always got a torch tucked away in my handbag just in case there's something out there worthy of my attention.
So, a quick flick of the button to illuminate our way to your question for tonight - and it's a question for everyone. Who would you consider inviting to join us?
Keep your chin up, China. Don't let the bu&&ers get you down. They really aren't worth it.
Night. x
So, a quick flick of the button to illuminate our way to your question for tonight - and it's a question for everyone. Who would you consider inviting to join us?
Keep your chin up, China. Don't let the bu&&ers get you down. They really aren't worth it.
Night. x
I can't really nominate anyone. I like people like Quinlad, NJOK (not around any more I think),Jake, Brachi, Theprof, Oneyedvic, Waldo, Keyplus (he can be funny), Whickerman, Nox, Boo, jno, Octavius (currently still in jail), Gromit, Whifffey etc... There's more no doubt but I can't think of them right now... and I know that at least three of those wouldn't pass muster which is fine with me as I can interact with (and for some am already in touch with) elsewhere.
Besides, I'm grumpy today.
Besides, I'm grumpy today.
Well, tumbleweed central! No decisions on new recruits then? I don't know what Starman thinks, but one or two of your nominations would be acceptable to me, China ...... but Keyplus? Yes, I agree he can be witty at times - but WOW! Are you sure about that?
Wonder who Theland and Luna would nominate? Come on chaps ............ make with the nominations.
Night. x
Wonder who Theland and Luna would nominate? Come on chaps ............ make with the nominations.
Night. x
Oh well . . . sometimes you just can't win. Just goes to show . . . you can please everyone . . . ~o">
D�oh! . . . can�t . . .
And I nominate gen2 . . . although I'm not so sure that he would consider that an appropriate gesture of gratitude . . . ~o">
As much as I cherish being one of the sanctuarians, it must be quite obvious by now that I am severely lacking in either the sales or recruitment departments. I believe I would be as happy as any of us to see some fresh faces and would not hesitate to welcome new blood within our midst. All the same I am quite pleased with the status quo . . . even if not everyone chooses to visit more often . . . ;o( . . . no, that is not a wink . . . that's a tear.
I would not suggest for a moment that everyone who belongs here is here. I am more Armenian than Calvinist in this regard . . . �Whosoever will may come!� But I would have to be out of my mind to jeopardise giving up having present company all to myself :o) if I alone could keep you satisfied . . . ~o�>
Nor do not rule out the possible existence of any silent partners still out there following this thread anonymously ;o)
And I nominate gen2 . . . although I'm not so sure that he would consider that an appropriate gesture of gratitude . . . ~o">
As much as I cherish being one of the sanctuarians, it must be quite obvious by now that I am severely lacking in either the sales or recruitment departments. I believe I would be as happy as any of us to see some fresh faces and would not hesitate to welcome new blood within our midst. All the same I am quite pleased with the status quo . . . even if not everyone chooses to visit more often . . . ;o( . . . no, that is not a wink . . . that's a tear.
I would not suggest for a moment that everyone who belongs here is here. I am more Armenian than Calvinist in this regard . . . �Whosoever will may come!� But I would have to be out of my mind to jeopardise giving up having present company all to myself :o) if I alone could keep you satisfied . . . ~o�>
Nor do not rule out the possible existence of any silent partners still out there following this thread anonymously ;o)
D'oh! . . . CAN!
China, keyplus? No, I am not ruling him? out but if this
I have never been one and don't think that I ever will be is an example of his? wit then it borders on pure genius.
I have never been one and don't think that I ever will be is an example of his? wit then it borders on pure genius.
Hi all,
Hope everyone is well. Alas Sticky who controls my internet access seems to have malfunctioned and is no longer speaking to Zappy (the laptop) so unfortunatley I can't get on so much at the moment as this is obviously book marked on Zappy but not on work computer! I don't think I'm going to be able to sort this out before the bank holiday weekend either.. I am going to the lake distrcit though so that's nice.
Keyplus really doesn't bother me one way or another, I find him amusing but I can see why others don't. I generally get along with or ignore most users so I'm not even remotely bothered and I believe I've made myself perfectly clear on the one or two users which would send me for the hills... If the combination of Sticky and Zappy not talking doesn't do that first!
Hope everyone is well. Alas Sticky who controls my internet access seems to have malfunctioned and is no longer speaking to Zappy (the laptop) so unfortunatley I can't get on so much at the moment as this is obviously book marked on Zappy but not on work computer! I don't think I'm going to be able to sort this out before the bank holiday weekend either.. I am going to the lake distrcit though so that's nice.
Keyplus really doesn't bother me one way or another, I find him amusing but I can see why others don't. I generally get along with or ignore most users so I'm not even remotely bothered and I believe I've made myself perfectly clear on the one or two users which would send me for the hills... If the combination of Sticky and Zappy not talking doesn't do that first!
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