Mad over Fifties Club

[ladyalex]

The Club is now open.

Welcome all to our weekly meeting. I am so glad to be back in the fold ,so to speak, after a couple of weeks absence.
I trust all went well when I was away and that the emergency services were not unduly bothered. (Remember the warning last year.)

I am sure that tailcocks and nibbles will be arriving shortly.

Raffle prizes so far include:

a packet of pink wax earplugs (hardly used)

half a tube of polo mints

and, from lordalex, three gas masks . (He can be so thoughtful sometimes).

[Meg]

boxtops, whatever will they think of next? Once these have been tested on animals they make a human form.

[Mamyalynne]

Well my Alfie is an agouti and beautifully house trained

[ladyalex]

If you are going to be our house-tree-surgeon and generally help out, ttfn, I think we should discuss your salary.
Mamya will let you know my bank details and you can arrange for the standing order for your wages to be paid in as soon as possible.

Good evening Alexanderd....quite agree with you, no more shopping at Iceland for us.

[boxtops]

I googled agouti, I had not seen one before. What do they eat (apart, that is, from the tripe, it has distinct tooth marks!)

[Meg]

Is Alfie well mamya? I am off for a ciggie, is all quiet out there or do I need to take a shotgun?

[ladyalex]

Petal...are you coming back later ?

I thought you knew where Uncle Joe and his mintballs were, Miss Meg.....I expect he will be with lordalex upstairs somewhere. They seem to enjoy one anothers company.

[alexanderd]

evening Ladya nice to have you back although I must say Matron has been admirable in your absence. I think a reduction in her wages may be in order

[boxtops]

That's what hit me on the head then, when I went out to inspect the moat - it was a well-aimed mintball!

[ladyalex]

Talking of animals, has anyone seen Hump or Ellie lately ?
HAs anyone cleaned them out lately ?

[ladyalex]

Well, as you know, Alexanderd, I do not normally reduce wages, but if you thikn she deserves it, perhaps we could reduce her hourly rate by a penny or two.

Talking of wages, I haven't seen any from you for some time and I know you do a lot od odd jobs around here...cleaning the moat etc. I think I may be due some back pay from you ?

[ttfn]

Silly boxy - that would have been typed 'my speeding is A1'. Are all the pets male then? They do range in size somewhat, but I suppose that prevents the members taking home the wrong pet after imbibing several cockatiels. Another drink anyone?
I regret i do not know the expression ' standing order' m'lady - I never pay money out

[ladyalex]

We'll organise a direct debit then, ttfn.

[ttfn]

I am beginning to like your art of persuasion m'lady. So there are no prisoners in the cellars then?

[alexanderd]

oh oh should have kept my mouth shut, thought we had a standing order m,lady I did increase it on April 1st as you suggested, Must have got lost in the post. Talking of post did I see you in the Royal Enclosure at Aintree last week with a handful of canapes and champagne when I walked my Shetland pony round the parade ring?

[ladyalex]

Not to my knowledge, but I have been away for a couple of weeks.

When we have to restrain lordalex or Uncle Joe, we usually can manage to keep them in their bedroom or in the upper lesser westernmost study.

[Meg]

Back now, all seems quiet next door.
Is this the weekend they have their anual trip to Skegness?

[ladyalex]

I thought it might have been you with the wee horsie, alexanderd.
How did you do with him/her ?
I expect The Chair was a bit of a challenge.
Thanks for the wages, by the way. I like a servant who pays up promptly.

[ladyalex]

I thin they went to Madeira this year, Miss Meg and of course, now they cannot get back because of the dust.

[Meg]

Well thank goodness for that, perhaps we could break in for a jolly jape and rummage through their stuff. We might get some of our belongings back.

[ladyalex]

Well, you know that I cannot condone burglary, Miss Meg, but if it meant we could regain out pot plants , woolly hats and walking sticks, then I feel I could turn a blind eye...