Mad over Fifties Club

[ladyalex]

The Club is now open.

Welcome all to our weekly meeting. I am so glad to be back in the fold ,so to speak, after a couple of weeks absence.
I trust all went well when I was away and that the emergency services were not unduly bothered. (Remember the warning last year.)

I am sure that tailcocks and nibbles will be arriving shortly.

Raffle prizes so far include:

a packet of pink wax earplugs (hardly used)

half a tube of polo mints

and, from lordalex, three gas masks . (He can be so thoughtful sometimes).

[alexanderd]

As I explained to members last week LadyA we fell at the first fence so I am thinking of unhitching the carriage next year

[ttfn]

Psst boxy - are the neighbours Mr & Mrs Maniacs and their son Klepto? I am up for a good rummage miss meg - 'twould be the second one tonight

[ladyalex]

I think that would be wise, alexanderd.

Has anyone else heard that dreadful noise?

[Meg]

ttfn, the neighbours are the bewildered lot, they're bad news. One dares to ask what was your first rummage tonight?

[Meg]

Yes I heard it, where is his Lurdship and Joe, heaven forbid.......

[ttfn]

My bathroom cabinet for my raffle prize donation miss meg. Do you think they are as bewildered as am I?

[Mamyalynne]

I mist add that Alfie has a refined palate and dines on scraps from the high table, doubt he`s been at the tripe

Ellie and Humph are few watered and out by the fountains

Shall I brew another vat of tailcocks

What is that dredful row??

[ladyalex]

I think it's getting louder.....


ttfn I don't think you realise the scale of the problem in the Home for the Bewildered next door. They truly are bad news.

[Mamyalynne]

Did someone require ministering to with the tiger balm, I shall fetch the meds trolley

[ttfn]

Hold the shetland. giraffe, kangaroo and agouti m'lady. I have a chainsaw - petrol driven - no need for an extension lead.The world is my lobster with my trusty machine. By the way I've not yet switched it on so the noise isn't down to me.

[ttfn]

Goodness gracious mamya - who owns the tiger?

[ladyalex]

I think the noise must be lordalex and Uncle joe.
Are they getting closer, or just louder ?

I don't think the Tiger Balm would go amiss, Mamya. Either for the old boys', who sound as though they are in need of it, or for our ears.

[Meg]

Good grief, I have got my credit card bill.
My accountant has pointed out that the figue at the top is my credit limit, not a target to give Mi'lady for Uncle Joe's upkeep.

[ladyalex]

Your post is a bit late, Miss Meg.
Has your postie had a puncture on his bike ?

[Meg]

No, that lot next door nicked his bike.

[ttfn]

Oh botheration I was expecting a money order via air-mail this week - I suppose I can forget that one now. M'lady - how about I just sign over my winter fuel payment to you. It is the larger one as I live on my own.

[alexanderd]

I have a unicycle you can have MissMeg no good to me any more because of my old war wound

[ladyalex]

Poor man. Having to trudge through the ash to get his deliveries done. Do youthink he would like one of our gas masks ?

I thought that noise had stopped, but it's starting up again.
Have you found them Mamya ? ANd if you have, can we help you in any way to quieten them ?

[ladyalex]

It is very good of you to giv eme your winter fuel payment, ttfn, but if you are going to have a regular job here, I'm afraid you have to pay wages. Check with Alexanderd and Mamya, my loyal retainers. (or in the case of Mamya and lordalex, restrainers.)

[Mamyalynne]

Yes it was Joe and his lud singing rugby songs, seems they sneaked into the scullery and had a go at my vat!! Have slipped them apowder they should quieten soon