Would You Accept His From Your Long Term Partner

[MDWCT2018]

I have been in a committed relationship with my boyfriend and we have been living together for 8 months now .In the early stages he was in awe of me but he has since, become more comfortable with me.
He lives with me in my flat. we have a next door neighbour who is a single mother with a young boy. The mother is a little bit nuts as one would expect being on her own with her child, but she does 'strange' things too such as walking in the hallway to throw her rubbish in sexy slips etc. Hmmmm......
Her child is very sweet and cute, but makes a lot of noise and I mean A-LOT of noise. If he is not screaming and throwing things and whining, it is his mother.
I have complained many times about this to the landlord because these are tiny city flats with thin walls, not exactly the ideal place to raise a child. The mother doesn't work and they never seem to leave their flat. My boyfriend agrees the woman is crazy but thinks I am a b***h for complaining about the child. Believe me, it not something I have done lightly but at 3 am it is like a banshee wailing and is scary. My best friend has said that for whatever reason my boyfriend has taken this Childs side (even though obviously my fight is not with the child) and that I deserve more loyalty from him. My friend has basically said that my boyfriend has chosen this child over me .... do you see it that way?

[Purist]

Well, you could complain to your landlord or to the council environmental health, they will ask you to keep a noise diary, chances are not much will happen especially if she is paying her rent, the child will go to school eventually and grow up eventually. not a lot you can do. people have this problem up and down the country, with the housing shortage there are lots of families in flats and bedsits now. If you have the ability to move, it could be your only other option

[woofgang]

maybe a complaint up front wasn't the most tactful way of addressing the problem and put the Mum on the defensive from the word go?

[MDWCT2018]

Hi Calico I think your posts are getting DISRESPECTFUL towards me. I think this post has brought up a a lot of YOUR insecurities that are blatantly evident in your posts.
It is a FACT that my boyfriend was in awe of me when we first moved in, positively besotted in fact ... are jealous of that, why does that bother you and not anyone else?
It is a FACT that she is a single mother an I mentioned that because there is other adult that I could raise the matter with.
It is FACT that she takes out her bins in sexy negligee and I personally think that is seedy and a bit desperate. that is my opinion.
It is FACT the flat cost £2000 and is aimed at City professionals NOT families ... this is why my company subsidies my rent.
I think you need to really look at your insecurities before you make harsh assumptions about me

[spathiphyllum]

"I feel she has a tall equine she ought to be poked off tbh."

That is what i'm talking about. Don't let someone irritate you (regardless) to the extent you wish them harm or some kind of prod. Discussion and debate is good but then when people add backhanded comments it becomes futile.

[spathiphyllum]

i think everyone needs to have a mojito and take a moment.

[ummmm]

Spath...sometimes you need to know when to shut up!!

There could be a number of reasons why the child is crying. And maybe, just maybe, she didn't actually chose to live there.

This thread is shocking.

[spathiphyllum]

at 2K a month, i'm sure she did choose to live there. If she didn't, then she's being put up by someone. Even more reason to respect those around you who need to work and sleep etc..

[Calicogirl]

MD, I feel that you are being extremely disrespectful to the girl concerned and it's shallow and tacky. You clearly think you are much better than her.
I'm perfectly fine and dandy thanks very much in my relationship and living scenario so another off centre generalisation from you, but knock yourself out, I simply suggested as a FACT that your boyfriend doesn't have a problem with your neighbour, so you might be the one at fault not him.

[Neveracrossword]

Back to the OP - yes, I would accept this from my long-term partner. I don't see him as 'taking the child's side'. If he agrees with you - or even just says he agrees with you - that doesn't prove 'loyalty'. Couples can be loyal to each other without having to accept each other's opinions.

[Purist]

I feel MDW is more interested in arguing than being proactive. Ok so the property is aimed at professionals, if she wasn't suitable she would not have been allowed to rent it. I would imagine most people who live in small flats would not choose to stay there if they won the lottery. So perhaps she has no choice.

[ummmm]

Spath...get real...some single parents have no choice where they live. She could have lived there before the child was born or the council could have allocated it to her.

[spathiphyllum]

Ummm, it's not council. And again.. the rent is 2K?????

[chelle7272]

Calicogirls posts are not disrespectful, just not what you want to hear...

[chelle7272]

spath I private rented then got divorced and ended up a single parent in a place too expensive for me until I was in a positin to change things. Don't make assumptions.

[spathiphyllum]

This thread has become hostile. There is no need for it to be this way.