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Jokes

Looking for a laugh? There are plenty of funny jokes being told on The AnswerBank, so sit back, relax and have a read.

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piggynose
https://youtube.com/shorts/BjDoaY35qxU?si=tMP1cbN8ewp2m9jn Did this make you giggle? 😂  ...
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Rondy
I was standing in the queue in Aldi earlier and a voice announced "Checkout no.5 please."
I thought, I've seen better than her. ___ Did you hear about the cannibal spider that ate his uncle’s wife?... ...
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Canary42
"My husband and I went through the McDonald's driveway window and I gave the cashier a £5 note. Our total was £4.25, so I also handed her 25p. She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I... ...
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Patsy33
I've just gone on the Adam Ant diet. It's dead easy; Don't Chew Ever 👍
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Patsy33
I said to the Doctor, "When l move my leg it makes a Mooing noise". He replied,"It sounds like a Calf injury"
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Patsy33
I just saw a car being driven by a sheep in a  swimsuit...it was a lamb bikini.
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Canary42
If anyone can tell me how to repair a broken hinge, my door is always open. 
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Rondy
I was raised by a herd of billy goats.
We couldn't afford a nanny. ___ The total number of people who get words wrong, would cover an area the thighs of whales. ___ I went for a drink with some heavy... ...
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Canary42
I'm sad to see that my local archery shop had to close, but I guess it was inevitable as they just weren't hitting their targets.
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fourteen85
New this year, we decided to buy Lindt chocolates for the kids for last night. Also new, we decided that when they knocked we wouldnt  open the door
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Khandro
Did Saul Bellow? I know Oscar was Wilde, but wasn't Thornton Wilder?  I think John was Gay and Hopkins was Manly, but then, who cares if Immanuel Kant  when Kubla Khan ? 🙂
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Rondy
A young boy came home from school and told his mother, "I had a big fight with my classmate. He called me a sissy." The mother asked, "What did you do?" The boy replied, "I hit him with my... ...
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Patsy33
While working at the Rolling Stones bakery, you can't always get what you want. But you do get what you knead. 
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Patsy33
Church Ladies With typewriters are at it again! They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS) actually... ...
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Patsy33
I'm just on my way out to fix Cat
Stevens' caravan.
Awning has broken…
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Chipchopper
How do you start a milk pudding race ? Just say-go!
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Patsy33
I was talking to my neighbour today, he said, "I went to one of those Turkish baths on holiday...They shaved with razor-sharp blade below the neck line, snipped ear & nose hairs, waxed chest hairs... ...
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kinnairdie
ANAGRAM    - EYJNROOA,                 Actress -         2.6  any ideas?
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Clone
A man hovers above a man on floor,  pointing at him he says  ''You won't ever threaten me again will ya'' A bystander shouts 'the MP for Runcorn *$&^*ing smacking someone on the floor'     There is a... ...
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Canary42
Apparently Julie Andrews will no longer be endorsing Rimmel Vibrant Shades lipstick, as she claims it breaks too easily, and makes her breath smell. In a statement, she said: "This super colour... ...

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