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marval

1121 to 1140 of 3998

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marval

Have Decided

I have decided I want to donate all my organs. I have always prefered pianos to be honest...
17:25 Wed 10th Feb 20168 answers, last by Arksided 17:54 Wed 10th Feb 2016
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marval

I'm Back

I've just got back from holiday. The hotel we stopped at was absolutely fantastic. The towels were so soft and fluffy, I could hardly close my suitcase....
14:31 Sun 07th Feb 2016
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marval

Immoral Behavior

Applying for a new position as a cleaning lady, the woman was asked why she had left her previous job. "I just wasn't comfortable with their immoral behavior," she replied. "Really? Like what did they...
16:22 Sat 06th Feb 2016
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marval

Paddy And Mick

Paddy and Mick arrive at the local Rugby match and Mick can't find the tickets. Mick says "Nip home Paddy and see if I left the tickets there." Paddy says "No problem, Mick." Half an hour later Paddy...
14:56 Sat 06th Feb 2016
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marval

I Don't

My partner called me into the bathroom and asked me to wash his back. I don't remember him washing me in the first place....
18:09 Wed 03rd Feb 20162 answers, last by marval 18:13 Wed 03rd Feb 2016
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marval

New Bike?

A man came back from a long business trip to find that his son had a new £300 mountain bike. "How did you get that, son?" "By hiking." "Hiking?" "Yes, every night, Mum's boss came over and gave me...
18:46 Mon 01st Feb 2016
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marval

Just One Please

An executive was scheduled to speak at an important convention, so he asked one of his employees to write him a punchy, 20-minute speech. When the executive returned from the big event, he was...
17:59 Sun 31st Jan 2016
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marval

Beware The Office Romace

The pretty secretary came in late for work the third day in a row. The boss called her into his office and said. "Now look Sharon, I know we had a wild fling for a while, but that's over. I expect you...
17:10 Sat 30th Jan 20162 answers, last by cupid04 02:33 Sun 31st Jan 2016
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marval

Doctor Sqad

"Doctor Sqad, you have got to help my husband," a farmer's wife said frantically. "He thinks he's a racehorse. He wants to live in a stable; he walks on all fours and he even eats hay." "I'm sure I...
17:14 Thu 28th Jan 20163 answers, last by Sqad 18:39 Fri 29th Jan 2016
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marval

Oh No

A young salesman was out on business when one night he had to stop at a farm, the only room available was with the farmer’s pretty daughter. The farmer having heard this kind of joke before asked...
19:34 Tue 26th Jan 20161 answer, last by Canary42 19:37 Tue 26th Jan 2016
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marval

Yikes.

A man was riding on a crowded bus, standing room only. The bus stopped and an elderly lady got on carrying a large picnic basket. She stood right in front of the man and grabbed the overhead rail so...
20:49 Mon 25th Jan 20162 answers, last by -SharonA- 23:20 Mon 25th Jan 2016
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marval

You Don't Have To

Ole and Lena went to the same Lutheran Church. Lena went every Sunday and taught Sunday School. Ole went on Christmas and Easter and once in awhile he went on one of the other Sundays. On one of those...
16:58 Sun 24th Jan 20162 answers, last by Psybbo 17:02 Sun 24th Jan 2016
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marval

Quick Thinking

A married were couple sleeping when an intruder entered into their house. The intruder put a knife to the neck of the woman and said, "I like to know the names of my victims before I kill them, what...
13:13 Sat 23rd Jan 20164 answers, last by viv41 13:25 Sat 23rd Jan 2016
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marval

Ouch

Two guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window, and the trooper smacks...
11:52 Sat 23rd Jan 20161 answer, last by Svejk 11:54 Sat 23rd Jan 2016
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marval

Suck

A man is sitting next to a woman who's trying to breast-feed her baby on a bus. The baby refuses to suck the breast and the mother warns, "If you don't suck, I shall give it to the uncle next to me."...
23:56 Fri 22nd Jan 20165 answers, last by weecalf 18:27 Sun 24th Jan 2016
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marval

Why Bicycles Are Better Than Women

Bicycles don't get pregnant. You can ride your Bicycle any time of the month. Bicycles don't have parents. Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong. You can share your Bicycle with your...
20:15 Fri 22nd Jan 20165 answers, last by TWR 20:43 Fri 22nd Jan 2016
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marval

Did He Get The Job?

A bad CV I think. NAME: Armando Rodriguez. DESIRED POSITION Reclining. Ha ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first...
22:15 Thu 21st Jan 201612 answers, last by Hopkirk 23:03 Thu 21st Jan 2016
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marval

If The Shoe Fits Pray

I bet this one would be too big for Cinderella. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-35320373...
17:53 Thu 21st Jan 20165 answers, last by Psybbo 19:36 Thu 21st Jan 2016
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marval

Chef On Board

An Airline starts a new concept of having a chef on Board the plane. This demanding passenger walks up the aisle and tells the hostess, "Let me get a cheeseburger, not too rare, not too well done, but...
17:11 Wed 20th Jan 20162 answers, last by retrocop 18:41 Wed 20th Jan 2016
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marval

Male And Female Elements

Element Name: MAN Symbol: XY Atomic Weight: (180+/-50) Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure...
17:54 Sat 16th Jan 20162 answers, last by waterboatman 07:09 Sun 17th Jan 2016

1121 to 1140 of 3998

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