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marval

1881 to 1900 of 3998

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marval

Blonde Dog

Crying her eyes out, the blonde approached the policeman and said that her dog, Fido, was lost. He suggested that she put an ad in the paper. The blonde replied. "Well, I thought of that officer, but...
23:44 Wed 26th Feb 20146 answers, last by cupid04 16:22 Thu 27th Feb 2014
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marval

Three Groans

This English landlady had a couple of struggling poets for tenants. When the poor fellows got behind in their rent, and the landlady was unable to have them evicted, she decided to murder them. She...
16:38 Tue 25th Feb 20142 answers, last by bookbinder 16:40 Tue 25th Feb 2014
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marval

Another Pun Here

One day, two hillbillies saw something that looked like a Bigfoot. He was all hairy except he had a sharp horn on top of his head. "What the hell is that thing", the first hillbilly asked. "I think...
15:48 Tue 25th Feb 201425 answers, last by marval 18:54 Tue 25th Feb 2014
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marval

3.00Am

The husband was not home at his usual hour, and the wife was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3:00 AM she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the...
23:41 Mon 24th Feb 2014
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marval

Sex

A woman was in a sex boutique shopping for vibrators when the clerk said, "Perhaps you might be interested in this one. It's our most realistic model." The woman said, "You mean it's shaped exactly...
19:42 Mon 24th Feb 2014
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marval

Slight Response

A woman was in a coma, she had been in it for months. Nurses were in her room giving her a blanket bath. One of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the...
18:06 Mon 24th Feb 20142 answers, last by pixie373 20:25 Mon 24th Feb 2014
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marval

More Food

Little Johnny and his family lived in the country, and as a result seldom had guests. He was eager to help his mother after his father appeared with two dinner guests from the office. When the dinner...
21:39 Sun 23rd Feb 20141 answer, last by tonyav 21:41 Sun 23rd Feb 2014
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marval

Children

A young man agreed to baby-sit one night so a couple could have an evening out. At bedtime he sent the youngsters upstairs to bed and settled down to watch football. One child kept creeping down the...
16:24 Sun 23rd Feb 20144 answers, last by tonyav 20:30 Sun 23rd Feb 2014
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marval

Food

As a child, I had an obsession with Posh Spice. It cost my mum a fortune in saffron. I went to a restaurant and ordered a baby roast chicken. They gave me a burnt egg. I read recipes the same way I...
17:53 Sat 22nd Feb 20145 answers, last by tonyav 20:11 Sun 23rd Feb 2014
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marval

Caught Out

One day there was a big lady swimming at the beach when she noticed that she had lost her top. She thought that no one would notice if she covered herself with her arms and walked over to her towel....
21:52 Fri 21st Feb 2014
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marval

Feeling Punny?

What do you call a musician who steals sheet music? A clef-to maniac. An instructor at an ice cream parlour is a sundae school teacher. I simply must find a new podiatrist. My podiatrist has developed...
22:41 Thu 20th Feb 20146 answers, last by zebo 10:58 Fri 21st Feb 2014
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marval

Drunk Push Up

A drunk staggers into a bar demanding a beer. The bartender informed him that he was not allowed to serve alcohol to drunk patrons. After a few harsh words, the bartender suggested to the drunk he...
16:15 Thu 20th Feb 20143 answers, last by pixie373 17:51 Thu 20th Feb 2014
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marval

How Long?

Hymie is an elderly yarn merchant who has the misfortune of living next door to Fred, a well known anti-Semitic. One day Fred calls on Hymie and says, "Hey Jew! I need a piece of gold silk." "OK,"...
22:47 Wed 19th Feb 20144 answers, last by berniecuddles 11:29 Thu 20th Feb 2014
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marval

What's Up Doc?

"Doctor, are you sure I'm suffering from pneumonia? I've heard once about a doctor treating someone with pneumonia and finally he died of typhus." "Don't worry, it won't happen to me. If I treat...
23:54 Tue 18th Feb 20142 answers, last by vulcan42 01:21 Wed 19th Feb 2014
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marval

What Is It?

On Valentine’s Day, the receptionist arrived at the doctor’s office. A mystery man was pacing up and down outside holding a package. As she got out of the car, he declared warmly, "I have...
17:23 Tue 18th Feb 20143 answers, last by bookbinder 17:27 Tue 18th Feb 2014
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marval

And The Results Are?

I thought I'd let my doctor check me, Because I didn't feel quite right All those aches and pains annoyed me And I couldn't sleep at night. He could find no real disorder But he wouldn't let it rest....
16:01 Tue 18th Feb 20145 answers, last by marval 16:06 Tue 18th Feb 2014
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marval

Is This Ed In Later Years?

http://www.motifake.com/dwarves-old-age-dwarves-old-age-demotivational-posters-38777.html...
20:00 Mon 17th Feb 20146 answers, last by roger 23:58 Mon 17th Feb 2014
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marval

American Johnny

One year, Johnny's family was having an "extended family" 4th of July cookout at their home. One of the special treats that year was lighting the fireworks (Roman candles, bottle rockets, missile...
14:11 Mon 17th Feb 20142 answers, last by Peaspeculiars 16:55 Mon 17th Feb 2014
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marval

A Gift For The Teacher

On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist's son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, "I bet it's some flowers!" "That's...
20:03 Sun 16th Feb 20143 answers, last by Peaspeculiars 23:38 Sun 16th Feb 2014
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marval

Panty Rub.

A man asked his neighbour how he kept his car looking so nice and glossy. The neighbour replied that his wife gave him all her worn out panties and he used these to polish his car with. Being a...
17:02 Sun 16th Feb 2014

1881 to 1900 of 3998

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