A man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of an airplane. The woman sneezed, took out a tissue, gently wiped her nose, then visibly shuddered for ten to fifteen...
just home from work - now on holiday for two weeks i have looked forward to this for eight months, i am exhausted and ready for a great time off to the airport tomorrow - and fly out very early sunday...
1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. 2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran. 3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart. 4. Funny,...
On a desolate island in the middle of nowhere, the following group of people are shipwrecked: 2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman 2 French men and 1 French woman; 2 German men and 1 German woman; 2...
A guy goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Church He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down. There's a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry...
A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and a shoe shine." The barber began to lather his face and sharpen the old straight edge while a woman with...
A successful scientist was on his way to a seminar where he was supposed to give a lecture on his new breakthrough in research. His chauffeur saw his tired look and felt sorry for him. "Sir, why don't...
The weather was very hot and this man wanted desperately to take a dive in a nearby lake. He didn't bring his swimming trunks, but who cared? He was all alone. So he undressed and got into the water....
Two Texans were having the Blue Plate Special at their favorite truck stop when they heard this awful choking sound. They turned around to see a lady, sitting a few bar stools down from them, turning...
Hi I cannot find anything for Zakynthos but depending on the route I have found these times for Greece taken from nearest city of Athens. For some reason it won't let me copy and paste from there so...
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.. 2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair. 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second...
My uncle just got struck off the medical register for having sex with his patients, it's a real shame cause he's a really good vet. >>>>>>>>> Woman walks past a pet shop with a sign reading 'For sale...
I just brought a friend of mine a new fridge, should have seen his face light up when he opened it! **** I've just had a letter back from Screwfix. they said they regretted to inform me that they're...
Paul McCartney poem-: We lay upon the grassy bank, my hands were all a quiver, I slowly undid her suspender belt and her leg fell in the river. > It's important to keep fit as you get older, my granny...
Now, I want to make it clear from the start that I'm not looking for sympathy! Just wanted to share that my darling daughter would have been 46 today. Sadly she passed away aged 5 and that's how I...
After a hour of looking at every 3D TV in the shop the assistant asked me if I had seen one I liked, isaid sorry "but nothing is jumping out at me."...
Tuesday was the birthday of my girlfriend, Fingers, whom I have known for the best part of 40 years - indeed we were engaged to be married back in 1974 only to have the relationship broken up by...
