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excelsior-1

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Mamyalynne

Night Night Song From Mamya♥

♥♥♥...
00:22 Fri 25th Jan 20137 answers, last by mamyalynne 02:06 Fri 25th Jan 2013
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CailinDeas

Jumping On The Bed!!!

A fifty-ish woman was at home happily jumping on her bed and squealing with delight. Her husband watches her for a while and asks, "Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look?, What's the matter...
16:11 Thu 24th Jan 20135 answers, last by excelsior-1 00:30 Fri 25th Jan 2013
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excelsior-1

Fao Loftielottie

saw your comment in another thread about seeking another avatar, on account of your current discomfort how about this one? http://www.nelsonideas.com/medical-information/medical upset stomach...
23:39 Thu 24th Jan 20134 answers, last by LoftyLottie 11:11 Fri 25th Jan 2013
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Meg

Power Cut

Electric went off about 30 minutes ago, ceiling lights have come on again but very dim. I'm on a laptop which is working on mains supply. Street lighting is still off and my oven made a very strange...
23:23 Thu 24th Jan 201310 answers, last by julia-mag 00:10 Fri 25th Jan 2013
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marval

Work

My boss stormed up to me in the office today and said, "You missed work yesterday, didn't you?" "Not particularly," I replied. I've quit my new job as a postman. They handed me my first letter to...
19:02 Thu 24th Jan 20135 answers, last by magicmick 00:34 Fri 25th Jan 2013
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marval

Work2

I keep seeing these signs reading, "Make money at home in your spare time." I thought, "What a great idea!" It turns out that's illegal, and it's called counterfeiting. I had to deliver a parcel to...
20:27 Thu 24th Jan 20139 answers, last by Rimseen 04:24 Fri 20th Jan 2023
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bednobs

Why Does ...

lager taste better from the bottle? popcorn taste better from a bowl? coke taste better through a straw? Can you think of anything else that tastes different depending on the method of consumption?...
22:29 Thu 24th Jan 201364 answers, last by Answerprancer 01:11 Fri 25th Jan 2013
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starone

Running The Marathon

A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work. One rainy day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway. 'Oh my God -...
10:26 Thu 24th Jan 20132 answers, last by excelsior-1 11:56 Thu 24th Jan 2013
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mrs_overall

Good Morning Campers

So you thought you were rid of me for a while longer did you? lol Many thanks for your unsympathetic messages - they were relayed to me by the lovely Gness and most of them cheered me up no end. Those...
10:21 Thu 24th Jan 201360 answers, last by mrs_overall 20:46 Thu 24th Jan 2013
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Jemisa

A Few Smiles For A Dreery Day...

Went out last night and got really wasted. I woke up in the middle of the night next to some bloke who was snoring and farting, so I knew I made it home OK! The wife's back on the warpath again. She...
11:42 Thu 24th Jan 201310 answers, last by triggerhippy 15:14 Fri 25th Jan 2013
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Jemisa

3 Envelopes...

An old man was on his death bed, and wanted to be buried with his money. He called his priest, his doctor and his lawyer to his bedside. "Here's £30,000 cash to be held by each of you. I trust you to...
14:41 Wed 23rd Jan 20133 answers, last by Starbuckone 10:20 Thu 24th Jan 2013
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Jemisa

D.i.y.

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She...
15:19 Wed 23rd Jan 20133 answers, last by excelsior-1 00:54 Thu 24th Jan 2013
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Jemisa

How Much Is...?

A man walks into a toy shop to get a Barbie doll for his 7yr old daughter. So he asks the assistant, as you would, "How much is Barbie?" "Well," she says, "we have Barbie Goes to the Gym for £19.95,...
16:20 Wed 23rd Jan 20135 answers, last by LochNessMonster 11:36 Thu 24th Jan 2013
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joko

Funeral Attire

i have a funeral on friday, and i was talking to some mates about what to wear - i am going to wear black trousers, black shoes, a dark blue top with some decorative stitching across the neckline and...
18:06 Wed 23rd Jan 201333 answers, last by excelsior-1 00:42 Thu 24th Jan 2013
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humbersloop

Prompted By Another Thread, What's Your Funeral Music And Why?

..on a chipper note this frosty evening..
22:24 Wed 23rd Jan 201370 answers, last by BlueToffee 20:05 Thu 24th Jan 2013
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uncletom6

Ex Partner Still A Pain In The Rear

I have been split up from an ex partner for 8 years and every so often he rears his ugly head. whilst I was in a relationship with him he did some weird and wonderful things, always accusing me of...
11:41 Wed 23rd Jan 201323 answers, last by uncletom6 11:15 Mon 04th Feb 2013
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maggiebee

Makes You Think

Received this and thought I'd share it. Did you know the people that are the strongest are usually the most sensitive? Did you know the people who exhibit the most kindness are the first to get...
00:45 Wed 23rd Jan 201324 answers, last by murraymints 08:11 Wed 23rd Jan 2013
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Jemisa

Ben's Ashes...

A woman recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home. Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the table... She started talking to him, and tracing her...
00:40 Wed 23rd Jan 20136 answers, last by flump1 11:52 Sat 09th Feb 2013
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Jemisa

A New Wine For Seniors...

A single glass at night could mean a peaceful,uninterrupted nights sleep. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ NEW Wine for Seniors , I kid you not........
23:50 Mon 21st Jan 20139 answers, last by marval 18:48 Tue 22nd Jan 2013
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Georgiesmum

Are You Really Happy?

Are you really happy, or do you have lots of worries?...
00:09 Tue 22nd Jan 201369 answers, last by gness 02:02 Tue 22nd Jan 2013

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