Two little boys, Sammy and Tim, were sharing a room in hospital. As they were getting to know each other a little bit better, Sammy eventually asked Tim, "Hey, what're you in here for?" "I'm getting...
Confucius Say : It's OK to let a fool kiss you; but don't let a kiss fool you . Confucius Say : A kiss is just shopping upstairs for downstairs merchandise . Confucius Say : It is better to lose a...
Two Texans were having the Blue Plate Special at their favorite truck stop when they heard this awful choking sound. They turned around to see a lady, sitting a few bar stools down from them, turning...
An Australian, a Frenchman and an Italian are talking about married life The.Italian: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in wine, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes...
A man was approached by his co-worker Bill at lunch who invited him out for a few beers after work. The man said that his wife would never go for it, that she does not allow him to go drinking with...
A nurse was on duty in the emergency department, when a punk rocker entered. This young woman had purple hair styled into a mohawk, a variety of tattoos and strange clothing. It was determined that...
My uncle just got struck off the medical register for having sex with his patients, it's a real shame cause he's a really good vet. >>>>>>>>> Woman walks past a pet shop with a sign reading 'For sale...
Paul McCartney poem-: We lay upon the grassy bank, my hands were all a quiver, I slowly undid her suspender belt and her leg fell in the river. > It's important to keep fit as you get older, my granny...
On their first date, Joe took Rose to the carnival. When he asked her what she wanted to do first, Rose replied, "Get weighed." So Joe took her to the man with the scale who guesses people's weight....
My friend Rita & I were talking. “At our age, I don’t know what would be worse; Parkinson”s or Alzheimer”s?" Rita said. and me her wise friend answered, “Oh I’d rather have Parkinson’s,...
A man worked in a post office. His job was to process all mail that had illegible addresses. One day a letter came to his desk, addressed in shaky handwriting to God. He thought, "I better open this...
..................................................................................................... These lesbians next door gave me a Rolex watch for my birthday! It was a very nice gesture, but I...
Two salesmen were writing up their orders when the conversation came around to last night's big date. "So, how'd it go, Harry?" asked George. "Terrible," admitted Harry. "The moment we got back to her...
My H has been rummaging in the loft and found a box full of old cini films (8mm) of the kids (30) years old. Being as the equiptment to view these is missing he said he'd like to have theseput on to...
There are four types of sex, HOUSE SEX after you first get married you have sex all over the house.BEDROOM SEX, you only have sex in the bedroom. HALL SEX - After you've been married for many, many...
The whole world is waiting for this Royal baby, it was due on the 13th July where is it? These days they normally induce if its a few days late but here we are almost 10 days over... Is she pregnant...
Top ten things men would do if they woke up and had a Vagina for a day: 10. Immediately go shopping for zucchini and cucumbers. 9. Squat over a hand-held mirror for an hour and a half. 8. See if he...
Abloke walks into a pub and sees a sign that reads: Cheese Sandwich: £1.50 Chicken Sandwich: £2.50 Hand Job: £10.00 He checks his wallet and beckons to the sexy barmaid. "Are you the one who gives...
I'm breaking the tradition today. Although there's no sun it is still very warm so I'm down-sizing lunch today... We're having baked Lamb Shanks in mint gravy with crushed baby Jersey Royals in...