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marval

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marval

The Warden's New Kitchen

Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow inmates. The warden knew that, deep down, Andy was a good person. So, the warden...
12:25 Fri 17th Apr 20093 answers, last by marval 15:50 Fri 17th Apr 2009
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marval

Dreamy guy

A guy goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First, I'm a tepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a tepee, then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong...
16:30 Thu 16th Apr 20096 answers, last by marval 15:49 Fri 17th Apr 2009
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kitty1950

Chemo update.

Well the first visit went very well. I was there just over five hours as they were short staffed due to Easter holidays and staff days off. I got a bit tearful at first, probably a bit of nerves and...
12:23 Fri 17th Apr 200910 answers, last by ukfinanceguy 14:43 Thu 23rd Apr 2009
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marval

The World Expert on European Wasps

The World Expert on European Wasps The world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make is taking a stroll down his local town. As he passes by the record shop, a sign catches his eye:...
18:25 Thu 16th Apr 20095 answers, last by BilluSugger 17:31 Fri 17th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

For your de lick tation

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted,musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners...
09:22 Fri 17th Apr 20096 answers, last by Madmonks 18:38 Sat 18th Apr 2009
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WiseOldSage

Saddest song ever??

What's your vote?
21:34 Wed 15th Apr 200957 answers, last by WiseOldSage 11:07 Sat 18th Apr 2009
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tamirra

Swollen hands

Hello, my daughter in law rang me today saying she woke to find her hands were both swollen and red and painful to touch, anyone know why this should be? Thanks.
16:12 Thu 16th Apr 200913 answers, last by sqad617 19:11 Thu 16th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

Sting in the tail

News is coming in of a group of sticky-fingered thieves who apparently get a buzz out of breaking into a bee-keeper's yard and stealing the honey. Police are organizing a sting operation to catch them...
09:58 Thu 16th Apr 20093 answers, last by marval 16:29 Thu 16th Apr 2009
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McMouse

Jeanie's Burgers

Jeanie is an enterprising woman who runs a Burger Stall in a lay-by on a busy main road. She is famed for her "Lamb burgers", "Wild Boar burgers" and special "Jeanie burgers". One day a guy in an...
09:55 Thu 16th Apr 20094 answers, last by marval 16:27 Thu 16th Apr 2009
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claymore

whats burning?

Two hookers having a coffee after a night on the beat, one lights up a cigarette, the other one says "do you always smoke after intercourse"? she replies, "I don t know ,I ve never looked.
02:20 Thu 16th Apr 20091 answer, last by marval 16:26 Thu 16th Apr 2009
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marval

Shopping Duck

A duck goes into a shop and asks, "Can I have some lip salve please?" The shop assistant asks, "Will you be paying cash?" The duck replies, "No thank you, just put it on my bill."
16:59 Wed 15th Apr 20092 answers, last by marval 16:24 Thu 16th Apr 2009
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NoMercy

What's your favourite

Cuisine? I love Mediterranean, Indian and Thai.
23:20 Wed 15th Apr 200914 answers, last by NoMercy 00:35 Thu 16th Apr 2009
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NoMercy

Crazy Celebs' baby names

What do you think was the worst name a celeb has given their poor offspring? I think Shiloh (Brangelina) was diabolical. But, what strange name takes your fancy?
21:29 Wed 15th Apr 200928 answers, last by NoMercy 22:05 Wed 15th Apr 2009
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BilluSugger

Period pains

Why do women have periods? Because the f****** deserve them
20:11 Wed 15th Apr 20095 answers, last by carsonking 00:53 Fri 17th Apr 2009
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boomerang111

injections

i recently had to get my school vaccinations for hpv(cervical cancer) and was v nervous, wen i sat down i felt really unwell and she said i could not hav d jab, i had to go to hospital they sed i had...
21:47 Tue 14th Apr 20097 answers, last by marval 14:11 Wed 15th Apr 2009
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sophie_1003

prawny pun

Far far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean , two prawns were swimming around in the sea - one was called Justin and the other called Christian. The prawns were constantly being harassed and...
12:48 Wed 15th Apr 20095 answers, last by McMouse 16:19 Wed 15th Apr 2009
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kitty1950

Tomorrow is 'Chemo' day

Well this time tomorrow I will know what I have been worrying about for the last couple of days, will I be ill or will I be ok? I am planning on me feeling very sick so that if I aren't then it's a...
13:26 Wed 15th Apr 200920 answers, last by icemaiden 10:13 Fri 17th Apr 2009
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condom

unprotected sex

Hi basically I know a girl and I want to have sex with her without a condom. If I get het tested for HIV and all the other stuff what are the risks of me catching something? I mean she may have been...
13:35 Wed 15th Apr 200970 answers, last by condom 18:22 Wed 15th Apr 2009
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Phuckeruppa

A Young Chinese couple got married.

The new bride of course is still a virgin. On the wedding night, she cowers naked under the bed sheets as her husband undresses. He climbs in next to her and tries to be reassuring: "My darring, I...
10:19 Wed 15th Apr 20092 answers, last by marval 12:27 Wed 15th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

Some more one liners

Anatomy - something that everybody has but somehow looks better on a girl > Bachelor - a fellow that can take women or leave them, and prefers to do both. > Mistress - something between a mister...
10:59 Wed 15th Apr 20091 answer, last by marval 12:26 Wed 15th Apr 2009

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