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Jokes

Looking for a laugh? There are plenty of funny jokes being told on The AnswerBank, so sit back, relax and have a read.

201 to 220 of 2514

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Rondy

There's More

So I went for a job as a lumberjack..
Fella asks: "Have you any experience?"
I replied: "Have you heard of the Sahara Forest?"
He said: "You mean Sahara Desert!"
I said: "Yeah, well that's what they... ...
10:07 Sat 16th Dec 20233 answers, last by juliecarlstan 03:14 Sat 20th Jan 2024
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Rondy

Frog

A guy with a 25 inch willy goes to the doctor and said "I can't live with this willy anymore! It's too long!". The doctor replied "go to the swamp and find a female frog and ask her to marry... ...
17:25 Fri 05th Jan 20242 answers, last by Atheist 17:29 Fri 05th Jan 2024
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Rondy

And There's More

My careers officer in school asked me "what job can you see yourself doing?"
I said "mirror inspector" ___ A vicar visits a dentist for a new set of teeth. The first Sunday after he gets his new... ...
16:23 Thu 04th Jan 20241 answer, last by Patsy33 09:17 Fri 05th Jan 2024
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Rondy

The Traveller

Sean, who was a commercial traveller many years ago, became lost on a strange road on a wild, cold, stormy night. His car broke down. He thought he was in for a terrible night staying in the car... ...
11:59 Mon 01st Jan 20242 answers, last by Patsy33 16:06 Tue 02nd Jan 2024
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Rondy

A Few More

Not wanting to brag but, I have enough money saved, so I don't have to work for the rest of the year. ___ The other day, Robyn and I got into some petty argument. (I say it was petty. She would have... ...
12:41 Sun 31st Dec 20231 answer, last by Patsy33 12:45 Sun 31st Dec 2023
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Rondy

Paddy And Mick

Paddy and Mick were sitting in back of their trailers, shooting the breeze.  Paddy asked Mick, "If I snuck over to yore house while you wuz out fishin' an' I made love to your wife, an' she got... ...
11:55 Thu 28th Dec 20231 answer, last by Khandro 11:58 Thu 28th Dec 2023
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Smowball

For Wet Wet Wet Fans………

WET WET WET lead singer Marti Pellow was recently diagnosed with arthritis. When asked how it was affecting him he said... " I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes...." 😁
17:36 Sat 23rd Dec 20234 answers, last by jno 17:57 Sat 23rd Dec 2023
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Hopkirk

For Sale

I think I might sell my theremin. I haven't touched it for years.
13:06 Sat 23rd Dec 20232 answers, last by Ken4155 14:58 Sat 23rd Dec 2023
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-SharonA-

Xmas Present

I'M SO EXCITED... my boyfriend wanted to give me a special Christmas present. So with 1 dart and a world map he said to throw it and where it lands we will go there after the Christmas... ...
17:11 Thu 21st Dec 20234 answers, last by Chipchopper 13:05 Fri 22nd Dec 2023
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maggiebee

Addiction

I just got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows and nuts. I won't lie, it was a Rocky Road
14:15 Wed 20th Dec 20231 answer, last by Chipchopper 00:33 Thu 21st Dec 2023
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Rondy

There's More

Sally: Hmmm... there was something else I had to buy, and I can’t think of it.
Mary: Was it tuna fish... or cereal… or sugar… or coffee?
Sally: No, none of those things. Especially not coffee! I... ...
15:36 Wed 20th Dec 20231 answer, last by fripfrip 22:59 Wed 20th Dec 2023
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Canary42

Christmas List

Dear Santa, for Christmas I would like a fat bank account and a slim body. Please don't get them the wrong way round like last year.  
15:00 Wed 20th Dec 20231 answer, last by dustypuss 15:12 Wed 20th Dec 2023
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Rondy

And There's More

A bloke said to me today 'Are those thick lens glasses you're wearing?'
I said 'No, they're mine' ___ The inventor of the ballet skirt was struggling for a name for his invention.
Finally he put tu... ...
14:56 Tue 19th Dec 20232 answers, last by Rondy 14:27 Wed 20th Dec 2023
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rccatnap

Christmas Tree?

I went to buy a large Christmas tree and the sales person said, "Are you going to put it up yourself?" I said, "No, I was thinking the living room."
23:32 Mon 18th Dec 20231 answer, last by ladybirder 23:48 Mon 18th Dec 2023
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Rondy

A Few More

I asked my boss what browser he uses...
He said "Chrome"
I said "So why do people in the team say you're always on edge?" ___ I got into a fight with 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9.
The odds were against me. ___ Took... ...
10:21 Mon 18th Dec 20232 answers, last by retrocop 10:42 Mon 18th Dec 2023
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Canary42

Laundry Time

Husband (who is about to wash a bundle of his shirts in the washing machine): What shall I set the temperature to ?   Wife: What does it say on the T-shirt?   Husband: Pink Floyd
17:59 Sun 17th Dec 20231 answer, last by bookbinder 18:03 Sun 17th Dec 2023
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Canary42

Grandma

My mate said "we'll all miss grandma this Christmas, but we know she'll be looking down on us "

I replied "oh dear, when did she die?"

He replied "she's not dead, we're still waiting for the Stannah... ...
23:43 Thu 14th Dec 20233 answers, last by Ellipsis 12:31 Fri 15th Dec 2023
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DrNope

Lemonentry

Joke sherlock Holmes lemonentry    
08:04 Thu 14th Dec 20232 answers, last by jno 18:20 Thu 14th Dec 2023
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DrNope

Joke Lemonentry

Joke lemonentry  
08:04 Thu 14th Dec 20231 answer, last by Canary42 18:09 Thu 14th Dec 2023
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Rondy

And There's More

A man is being interviewed for a job. “What are your qualifications for the job of night watchman?”
“Well, The slightest noise wakes me up.” ___ I was driving down a lonely country road one cold... ...
12:26 Thu 14th Dec 20232 answers, last by Patsy33 13:10 Thu 14th Dec 2023

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