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Jokes

Looking for a laugh? There are plenty of funny jokes being told on The AnswerBank, so sit back, relax and have a read.

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Rondy
A blonde stormed up to the front desk of a library and said, "I have a complaint!"

"Yes, ma'am?"

"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!"

"What was wrong with it?"

"It had way too many... ...
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Chipchopper
But Armageddon out of here, said the last man on earth. Sorry 😆 
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retrocop
    An elderly couple  entered a McDonald’s store  and sat next to a table where some young people were having dinner. The old man walked over to the box and made the order for him.  He unwrapped the... ...
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Patsy33
Just saw this bloke going up a hill with a wheelbarrow full of horseshoes, four leaf clovers and rabbit's feet. I thought "he's pushing his luck."
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Rondy
By the time the sailor pulled into a little town every hotel room was
taken. "You've got to have a room somewhere," he pleaded. "Or just a
bed, I don't care where." "Well, I do have a double room... ...
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Rondy
This guy was staggering along the road, much the worse for the drink, throwing empty beer cans into the street and falling into peoples gardens. His singing gained the attention of a passing... ...
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Rondy
I was in a Café happily dipping my biscuits in other people's tea and they called the police...
Said I was Dunkin' disorderly. ___ I stayed at a hotel yesterday and couldn't help noticing that some... ...
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Rondy
Wife: Can I cut my hair and make it short? Husband: Cut it. W: I took lot of efforts to grow it long.. H: Then don't cut it W: They say short hair is the fashion these days.. H: Then cut it W: What if... ...
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melv16
Karl Marx's sister was called Onya?
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Rondy
My mate lost a toe and they replaced it with a rubber one.
His name is Roberto! ___ England has won the World Hairbrushing Championships!
It’s combing home, It’s combing home… ___ It's proving very... ...
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piggynose
Should be put behind bars!
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Rondy
An ice-cream van has crashed on the M56 - police have put cones out! ___ Was queuing up for tickets to a ska group gig and someone pushed in.

Bad Manners. ___
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Rondy
Beware of an online survey reputedly from the Magic Circle.
They’re all trick questions!
___ Just had to tell my kids we can’t afford to take them to Disneyland, but I did promise to take lots of... ...
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Rondy
A police officer rings into his station: "I'm at this house sergeant, the one where a woman has shot her husband for walking on the floor that she'd just mopped."

"Ok, constable, have you arrested...
...
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Hymie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhXKwKkwulI ...
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melv16
Does Kerry Katona have a cat?
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maggiebee
ADULT A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle. BEAUTY PARLOUR A place where women curl up and dye. CANNIBAL Someone who is fed up with people. CHICKENS The only... ...
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Rondy
That storm Isha is so violent. I phoned the landlord this morning.
I said "It's about our roof."
He said "What about it?"
"We'd like it back!!" ___ I haven’t tried yoga, but I have tried bending over... ...
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Rondy
A waiter places a warm cup in front of the gentleman. The gentleman takes a sip and spits it out.
He turns to the waiter and says, “Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud!”
The waiter, looking... ...
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Khandro
Well, it made me laugh https://ibb.co/Mg9z7B8 ...

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