Quizzes & Puzzles2 mins ago
Boris's broadcast tonight is a recording.
He was too scared of doing it live and facing journalists' questions.
Where's that fridge when you need it ?...
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Trying to control her frizzy and dry hair, Kay treated her scalp with olive oil before washing it. Worried that the oil might leave an odor than that her hair obviously needed it, she washed her hair...
We'd been married 60 years recently and my wife said I should buy her something with diamonds in it. I'm not sure she was impressed by the pack of cards though.
Earlier this month, my wife dropped a heavy hint as to what she wants for Christmas. She said that she dreamt that I had given her a diamond necklace as a present and wondered what the meaning of the...
"I keep eating my feather pillow when I’m asleep. It's really starting to depress me."
"Down in the dumps?"
"Dunno. I haven't been yet"....
Another nicked from Facebook
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Two Irishmen are sitting in a small town bar, where Mick bragged to Sean, "You know, I had me every woman in this town, except of course, me mother and me sister." "Well," Sean replied, "between you...
I went to an 'Inter-Religion Integration Seminar' on Sunday: The Bishop came, laid his hands on my hand and said: "By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!" I smiled and told him I was not...
I hate cocaine. . . . . But I love the smell of it. ;¬)...
I've just come across an organisation dealing with rescued dogs which have been neutered. It's called . . . .. . . wait for it . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Mutts Without Nuts :-)...
Since Santa flies over American air-space, he is required to under-go annual certification to fly by the Federal Aviation Administration. The FAA inspector arrived at the North Pole to see Santa...
Tampax have announced they will be removing the string from the tampon and replacing it with tinsel! This will be for the Christmas period only Time for other really bad Christmas jokes to...
What does a Spanish chap say to his girlfriend after they’ve made love in a meadow?
Grassy ass....
Bought Mrs McMouse a wooden leg for Christmas. Not her main present….just a stocking filler. I’ll get my coat....
I was so hungry that I ended up eating the Christmas decorations in my living room.
Bad move......I've been diagnosed with tinselitis!...
Spanish singer Julio Iglesias was on television with British TV host Anne Diamond when he used the word 'manyana'. Diamond asked him to explain what it meant. He said that the term means "maybe the...
The teacher asks for a sentence including the words defence, detail and defeat.
Little Johnny replies, if a horse jumps defence defeat are first, detail follows...
Paddy hates his wife's cat so much that one day he drove to the next town and dumps the cat. But when he reaches home, the cat is there. So the next day he drives 50 miles away and dumps it in the...
just saw a lyra clad person getting on a treadmill putting a water bottle in the pringles holder...
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