Quizzes & Puzzles4 mins ago
..Snails don't play hide and seek. https:/
..dogs don't use the internet https:/
..Cats eventually get to heaven. https:/
My wife ran off with the plumber. It's left me feeling drained 🙄
A Yorkshire man walks into a vets.
Man: "Summit up wi' t' cat."
Vet: "Is it a tom?"
Yorkshire man: "Nah, it's ere int basket."
Man: "Summit up wi' t' cat."
Vet: "Is it a tom?"
Yorkshire man: "Nah, it's ere int basket."
I've got two albums to listen to tonight, one by The Jam and the other by Cream.
I just don't know which one to put on first!
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The mutant World Cup final will be played over 3 legs.
___
I was at a... ...
I just don't know which one to put on first!
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The mutant World Cup final will be played over 3 legs.
___
I was at a... ...
A woman was enjoying a good game of golf with her girlfriends. "Oh, no!" she suddenly exclaimed. "Look at the time! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He'll be so *** if it's... ...
..some men always be single. https:/
A woman answered her front door and found Little Johnny and Billy holding a list. "Lady," Johnny explained, "We are on a scavenger hunt, and we still need three grains of wheat, a pork chop bone... ...
I Just walked into Waterstones and said, "I'd like a book by Shakespeare please ?"
"Of course, Sir, which one?" She said.
I replied, "William."
Not too clever some shop assistants are... ...
"Of course, Sir, which one?" She said.
I replied, "William."
Not too clever some shop assistants are... ...
Paddy's wife was ready to give birth so he rushes her to hospital.
On arrival the nurse asks 'how dilated is she'?
To which Paddy replies 'Dilated....Oh Jaysus we're both over the moon'!
___
Just paid... ...
On arrival the nurse asks 'how dilated is she'?
To which Paddy replies 'Dilated....Oh Jaysus we're both over the moon'!
___
Just paid... ...
..Rhinos don't paint. https:/
Lord Nelson was about 5ft 6in tall. His statue is 17ft 4in tall. That's Horatio of about 3:1.
A guy answers his door one night and a massive cockroach is standing on his doorstep. Without warning, the cockroach attacks... It beats the man up, throws him across his front-room; and then runs... ...
My friend Alfie who is a keen cricketer had both his legs amputated. First match back he was out first ball. Stumped!
Ducks enjoy hunting season. https:/
..Pinocchio doesn't like winter. https:/
Gladiator: My name is Maximus Decimus Christophus Meridius commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to-...
Barista: I've run out of room on the cup... ...
Barista: I've run out of room on the cup... ...
From Blower in the Telegraph https://ibb.co/VMkXpSm ...
I had a crazy dream last night guys.
I was swimming in an ocean of orange pop.
Turns out it was just a Fanta sea.
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Polce toay have sa they are nvestgatng a strng of ID thefts.
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I don’t know why my... ...
I was swimming in an ocean of orange pop.
Turns out it was just a Fanta sea.
___
Polce toay have sa they are nvestgatng a strng of ID thefts.
___
I don’t know why my... ...
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