Body & Soul2 mins ago
the people of Dubai dont like the flintstones but the people of Abu Dhabi do...
What’s the difference between an outlaw and an in-law?
Outlaws are wanted....
What did the Italian baker say to the customer who left their bread on the counter and walked out of the door?
" Hey you focaccia bread"...
Do you want to make your lady feel special?
Place her picture in the kitchen and write Employee of the month on it.
She will love it!...
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At a wine merchant's warehouse the regular taster died, and the director started looking for a new one to hire. A drunk with a ragged dirty look came to apply for the position. The director wondered...
What did the man with dyslexia order at his local Italian restaurant?
Tapas....
Doctor, Doctor. My daughter has swallowed my pen, what shall i do?. Just use a pencil until i get there!. Doctor, Doctor, i have lost my memory!. When did this happen?, when did what happen?....
What sound does a cow make when it runs out of milk?
None - there is udder silence....
I need a change of career, and can't decide whether to be a hairdresser or a short story writer.
I'll toss a coin. Heads or tales....
A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says "Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bust line forty four"....
Good news for my mate from the hospital. He had a bang on the head and thought he was a Shetland Pony and lost his voice and could only say neigh, neigh. The doctors say his voice is coming back but...
..A book from Ikea
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Yesterday I spotted an albino Dalmatian.
It was the least I could do for it....
A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the bushes and hopped around the crashed car. The...
Two friends, a white guy and a black guy went to the doctor. Both were desperate for help ----------- The white man kept changing colour , pink, green, yellow, white etc. he felt like a lava lamp. The...
A young mother paying a visit to a doctor friend and his wife made no attempt to restrain her five-year-old son, who was ransacking an adjoining room. But finally, an extra loud clatter of bottles did...
Jokes about feet are corny, but jokes about eyes are cornea.
Riding the favourite at Cheltenham, a jockey was well ahead of the field. Suddenly he was hit on the head by a turkey and a string of sausages. He managed to keep control of his mount and pulled back...
My friend is a dab-hand at fixing things, at least as good as anyone on those TV programs repairing all sorts of stuff. Today I told him I had broken something that I thought even he could not fix....
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