Film, Media & TV0 min ago
I tried counting sheep to get to sleep last night.
I got to 500 then lost interest so went home from work and got into bed. ___ Some people thought my plan to design a building with a two-kilometer... ...
I got to 500 then lost interest so went home from work and got into bed. ___ Some people thought my plan to design a building with a two-kilometer... ...
A dwarf was drinking in a bar when a sexy blonde walked up to him and said “I’ve always wanted to have sex with a little person”
The dwarf replied “I’m sorry, but I’ve had women say that before,... ...
The dwarf replied “I’m sorry, but I’ve had women say that before,... ...
A LOT OF PEOPLE do NOT know what is the actual colour of water.
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Well, if you think about it, the answer is very clear.
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Did you hear about the man who fell into the upholstery machine? He's fully... ...
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Well, if you think about it, the answer is very clear.
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Did you hear about the man who fell into the upholstery machine? He's fully... ...
This guy in the pub was telling loads of jokes about Motown singers, and I said to him how many Motown jokes do you know at "least a 100, and that's four tops"
Snails don't play hide and seek https:/
A priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner. A local politician and member of the congregation was to give a speech at the dinner. He was delayed, so the priest decided to say a few words... ...
https:/
I read in the newspaper a tip to use Vodka for cleaning around the house.
I must say it really works too, the more Vodka I drank the cleaner the house looked. ___ I was sitting on the toilet when the... ...
I must say it really works too, the more Vodka I drank the cleaner the house looked. ___ I was sitting on the toilet when the... ...
I was invited to a fancy dress party the other day, and decided to go dressed as a screwdriver. It turned a few heads, I must say!
If I had 50p for every maths exam I've failed,
I'd have £3.74 now. ___ I can put up with most things from my work-mates; but stealing my digestives?
That just takes the biscuit. ___ I was in a lift when... ...
I'd have £3.74 now. ___ I can put up with most things from my work-mates; but stealing my digestives?
That just takes the biscuit. ___ I was in a lift when... ...
My son's swallowed some of our Scrabble tiles so now we're looking for an A & E.
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I`ve been told I need to go to hospital for an operation on my knees,I dont know why I cant just walk in like... ...
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I`ve been told I need to go to hospital for an operation on my knees,I dont know why I cant just walk in like... ...
I've been in bed for 20 minutes and l've just remembered, l only came upstairs for a pen. ___ Last night I had a terrible dream that I had to make a thousand pancakes.
I was tossing and turning all... ...
I was tossing and turning all... ...
Paddy staggered home very late and very drunk. He took off his shoes to avoid waking the wife. He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their bedroom, but misjudged the... ...
My neighbour does nothing but talk about growing tomatoes.
Think he’s suffering from the greenhouse effects.
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I don't think dad would like yeast extract but ma might.
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I called the Tax Office and... ...
Think he’s suffering from the greenhouse effects.
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I don't think dad would like yeast extract but ma might.
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I called the Tax Office and... ...
Someone glued my pack of cards together...
I'm finding it hard to deal with. ___ IF you close your eyes and rub a kiwi fruit in one hand and rub one of your testicles with the other, it's difficult... ...
I'm finding it hard to deal with. ___ IF you close your eyes and rub a kiwi fruit in one hand and rub one of your testicles with the other, it's difficult... ...
A man walks into a bar and shouts, "give me a whiskey and make it a double"! The barman looks at the guy and says "I think you've had enough don't you, so why don't you just turn yourself around... ...
Boss (to the new employee): "We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as you came in?"
New employee: "Yes, sir."
Boss: Get out, We are also keen on truthfulness. There is... ...
New employee: "Yes, sir."
Boss: Get out, We are also keen on truthfulness. There is... ...
One day, a young girl is walking through a park when she hears a faint, “Help me, help me.” She looks around and follows the quiet voice to a bush near the path. Looking under the bush she spies a... ...
Chaos occurred in an ATM queue this morning, when a Scotsman's kilt
fell down..... he'd forgotten his pin. ___ I took a degree in Salad studies. All I really wanted was some lettuce after my... ...
fell down..... he'd forgotten his pin. ___ I took a degree in Salad studies. All I really wanted was some lettuce after my... ...
Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink? He's still in A & E waiting to be seen.
