News2 mins ago
Jack: "I'm taking a weight lifting class. Every week the postman brings me a new set of weights." Bob: "Gee, you don't look like you've gained any muscle." Jack: "No, but you ought to see the...
My boss "I've created a new computer that is almost human." Me: "You mean that it can think, feel and reason just like a human would?" My boss: "No, but when it makes a mistake it blames it on another...
A blonde was visiting London for the first time. She wanted to see Downing Street. Unfortunately, she couldn't find it, so she asked a police officer for directions - "Excuse me, officer, how do I get...
A lady says to her doctor, "My husband has been complaining that my ladies bits have an odour, but I bent over and took a whiff, and I don't smell anything." The doctor examines her, and then says,...
Have you seen the price of eggs lately? A few ways high egg prices are changing the world: Only the wealthy can now afford to walk on eggshells. Eggs are now considered too good to scramble. "Laying...
Hey I'm celebrating being back in work this year for the first time in years. I was snapped up when I told the pottery company I was a coronation mug maker!
A man is asking a farmer about his two cows. Man: About how much milk do you get from them in a day? Farmer: Which one, the brown one or the black one? Man: The brown one. Farmer: About a half gallon...
My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life.
He was right — I feel ten years older already....
Who cares if I can't spell Armageddon, it's not the end of the world is it ?
Bought a chameleon yesterday, can't find it now !!
Top ten performance reviews: 10. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap." 9. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to...
For his birthday, Little Johnny's parents gave him a bowl of goldfish. His mother carefully explains to him how much responsibility comes with owning a pet and tells him to make sure he remembers to...
A deaf old man goes for a checkup to the doctors with his wife. Doctor, ''Mr Roberts, I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample please''. ''What did he say dear?'' says old Mr Roberts....
Q. Why do trumps smell?
A. For the benefit of the deaf....
The art of love making explained. An Italian man said, "Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her over with olive oil, we made passionate love, and she screamed for five full minutes at the...
Nine months to the day following their wedding, the Coopers had a baby. Unfortunately, it was born without arms or legs -- without even a torso. It was just a head. Still, the Coopers loved and cared...
Wife: "I'd like to donate this bag of clothes to the charity shop." Husband: "Why don't you just throw it in the bin & save all the hassle?" Wife: "But there are poor & starving people who could use...
Just in case you are having a rough day, here is a stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological journals. The funny thing is that it really does work. 1. Picture yourself...
I just had to ask the guy behind the counter at the wet fish market stall, "why his portions were so small.
He just laughed and said: "sorry, it's my work that makes me so shell-fish"...
When Jane reached the checkout counter, she learned that one of her items had no price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear,...
Latest Posts
Quizzes & Puzzles28 mins ago
Quizzes & Puzzles38 mins ago
ChatterBank41 mins ago
Quizzes & Puzzles100 mins ago
ChatterBank105 mins ago