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excelsior-1

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ELVIS68

Moaning Murray......

Petulant little brat What's his problem with the roof closing, if he's that good he should be able to play in any conditions?...
20:56 Fri 05th Jul 201328 answers, last by em10 07:58 Sat 06th Jul 2013
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Sparkles62

Horrible Horrible Sad Day.

I had an appointment at 2pm today, at the vets with my spaniel, Jack, He has been a bit off colour for the last few days, We had a lovely walk on the beach on sunday, monday night he wasn't that...
23:11 Thu 04th Jul 201359 answers, last by Sparkles62 13:29 Tue 09th Jul 2013
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jim360

Code-Breaking

I was wondering if I could have a volunteer or two -- anyone good at breaking codes?
17:05 Thu 04th Jul 201316 answers, last by stewey 20:27 Fri 05th Jul 2013
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excelsior-1

Quickie

A man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt and legs that won't quit came to his table and asked if he...
16:35 Sat 08th Jun 20134 answers, last by excelsior-1 19:55 Fri 05th Jul 2013
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McMouse

Noise Polution

Best weather of the year and have been driven in from the garden by (a) Roofer hammering across the road, (b) sundry leaf blowers and hedge trimmers being operated nearby and final straw (c) Local...
09:51 Fri 05th Jul 201311 answers, last by excelsior-1 17:51 Fri 05th Jul 2013
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albaqwerty

Half A Sandwich Short Of A Picnic

that's me! Put on summer dress this afternoon, only had it for a year and a bit, only to discover the thing has a zip in it. doh! On you go, confess, please :-D Make me feel human?...
16:21 Thu 04th Jul 201321 answers, last by ChillDoubt 19:05 Thu 04th Jul 2013
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daffy654

Bernie Nolan Has Died

Didn't know what section was best to put this in so CB will have to do. Bernie Nolan has died today aged 52 from cancer....
14:10 Thu 04th Jul 201329 answers, last by murraymints 06:02 Fri 05th Jul 2013
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McMouse

Duz Tha Speak Yorkshire?

Police have just released details of a new drug craze that is being carried out in Yorkshire nightclubs. Apparently, Yorkshire club-goers have started injecting Ecstasy just above their front teeth....
10:31 Thu 04th Jul 201321 answers, last by askyourgran 23:20 Sat 06th Jul 2013
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stewey

If Any Of You

...are still awake and are interested, I'll meet you down at the you know where in 30 minuets...Cheers:)
20:59 Wed 03rd Jul 201314 answers, last by mazie 21:17 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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cupid04

Two Guys..

Two guys are standing at the bar in a nightclub. One is hunky while the other is far less appealing. A woman spots the men and struts over to them. 'Do you wanna dance?' she says to the less...
16:27 Wed 03rd Jul 20134 answers, last by cupid04 19:23 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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cupid04

On Arriving Home....

A man arrives home from a business trip to find the dining-table set for two people, with candles flickering romantically and a bottle of champagne on ice. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife...
16:16 Wed 03rd Jul 20134 answers, last by marval 21:28 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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starone

Amazing Simple Home Remedies

THESE REALLY WORK!! 1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP. 2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT...
00:03 Wed 03rd Jul 20132 answers, last by excelsior-1 15:59 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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Jemisa

Deal Or No Deal?...

A man met a woman at a hotel. He saw that she was married by the ring on her finger, but decided to try anyways. He approached her, and asked her, "I know you're married, but i want to make you an...
11:57 Wed 03rd Jul 20134 answers, last by cupid04 15:59 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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silka

Wrist Pain After Fall

I fell onto concrete today. I put both hands out to save myself, I can't see any swelling as such and nothing is broken but the pain is extremely bad. I have taken painkillers, they are helping a...
15:51 Wed 03rd Jul 201310 answers, last by silka 16:23 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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Jemisa

Before & After...

BEFORE MARRIAGE: Husband - Aaah! ...At last! I can hardly wait! Wife - Do you want me to leave? Husband - No! Don't even think about it. Wife - Do you love me? Husband - Of course! Always have and...
14:36 Wed 03rd Jul 20135 answers, last by pixie373 15:55 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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slates

Puzzler

clue principal canvas of a ship 8 letters
21:00 Tue 02nd Jul 20137 answers, last by vakayu 21:05 Tue 02nd Jul 2013
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josaphine32

I Am Froze

Anyone else putting there heating on, its bleeding freezing,
18:44 Tue 02nd Jul 201340 answers, last by pusskin 21:47 Tue 02nd Jul 2013
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Jemisa

Tv Remote.

What is it about men and the TV Remote control?. It was my birthday and I wanted to make it a really special day, so I tied my Husband up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV....
23:51 Mon 01st Jul 20133 answers, last by cupid04 15:34 Tue 02nd Jul 2013
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Jemisa

Scotch!..

A man walks into a pub and says to the barman, ‘I want you to give me a 12-year scotch, and don’t try to fool me, because I can tell the difference.’ The barman is sceptical and decides to try...
00:29 Tue 02nd Jul 20132 answers, last by Doristhegreat 18:54 Wed 03rd Jul 2013
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Jemisa

Washing...

As my wife picked up the clothes for the washing machine, she noticed a pair of my pants. "What the hell? Look at the state of these, Dave! There's bl00dy great big skid marks in them, you dirty sod...
00:48 Tue 02nd Jul 20133 answers, last by AlwaysConfused 01:17 Wed 03rd Jul 2013

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