maggiebee Member Profile in The AnswerBank

A guy goes to the post office to apply for a job.

The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?" He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee." "Ok, Have you ever been in the military service?"...

moonraker558

Hair Remover

My wife found out that our dog, a Schnauzer, could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog's ears. He cleaned both ears, and the dog could...

missprim

Cold calling

Had a phone call today from my Broadband and telephone supplier trying to flog me something for my mobile. How annoying is it when they say 'Hi, and how are you today?' I swear one of these days I...

Smowball

Update to lastnites "WTF Happened??"

Esp for ummm,jno, tink etc...... He's leaving me. Excuse soggy keyboard...

carrust

Top Tip

An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.

rowanwitch

which talent would you choose/

And Why? To sing, to dance, to play a musical instrument, to paint, I would love to be able to sing to have the voice that makes people teary eyed with pleasure not agony...

tinkerbell23

Would one of you kindly

Go make me a big big mug of baby tea in my tinkebell mug please.... Oh and a peice n raspberry jam aswell... Pleeeeease......im sitting here with a wee thundercloud above my head and this would really...

ttfn

How Would You

rate your general interaction with other ABers? For example - tolerant, humorous, kindly, sharp, awkward, embarrassing, forgiving, helpful, OTT? I do hope B00 is still on here, can't wait ;) x...

Smowball

WTF happened??

Okaaaay, very odd. Hubbie watching tv. Son comes in and also sits down, whilst txting on his mob. Conversation goes as follows: H: Who are you txting? S:Just mates. H:What mates? S: You wouldnt now...

EvianBaby

Anything good on the box

Tonight?

starone

Ye ken yur a Scot if

Ye can properly pronounce McConnochie, Ecclefechan, Milngavie, Sauchiehall St , St Enoch, Auchtermuchty and Aufurfuksake. Yer used tae four seasons in wan day. Ye kin fall about pished withoot...

MustangLady

Did anyone see photos of Dawn French today?

Did anyone see the photos of Dawn French today in the newspaper? I didn't recognise her, she has lost loads of weight but in the photos shown today I actually think they made her look so much older,...

Sado

Knitting needle attacks

Just read in the local paper that some guy has been attacking students with knitting needles. Seven attacks so far. A police spokesman thinks the attacker is working to a pattern....

quinie

Thread removed?

I've been at a meeting tonight and just logged on to see how the discussion? about the ABer who asked a lot of quesions went. I see it has been removed-just wondered why.Does the Ed give a reason for...

Ann

Limit to questions asked ...............

Is there a limit to how many questions an ABer can ask in a short space of time? I only ask as one Aber has asked 23 since Monday, not that it affects me, the only downside is that other questions get...

maggiebee

Dress Code

I have been invited to a friend's confirmation as a Priest in Malta. Not being a Roman Catholic and never having been inside a cathedral I am unsure of the appropriate dress code. The event is in mid...

WF8MAN

Where's the Jokes Category?

Will someone tell me where the jokes category is? I've looked and I can't see it! Please correct me on this, if you find it.)...

EvianBaby

Unwanted attention dilema

Since i split up with my ex this guy had been texting me a lot asking me to go out with him. I either responded with a polite thanks but no thanks or just ignored his text completely, pretending id...

WF8MAN

Joke?

An apple got fruity with a pear the other day. A tomato butted in and said, "forget him, love, I'm your love apple!"

cupid04

Mastermind?

If you were to go on Mastermind what would your specialised subject be? Mine would be Emmerdale!...

Questions

Answers

Best Answers