Many years ago a Mary Jane Wilkinson was known as a black widow. She was convicted of killing three husbands, and was sentenced to be hung. On the day of her execution the prison officer asked her if...
Wayne was returning home from a business trip... bags in hand ... and slowly making his way to his vehicle in the crowded airport garage. Suddenly a large dark car screeched to a stop in front of...
A blonde woman strode angrily into the large store, slapped a package on the counter, and loudly expressed her dissatisfaction. The clerk asked, "What's the problem? Wouldn't your cat eat...
A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, the lady is furious! She...
Murphy, O’Shea & Mullligan go for a job on a building site, but have been told beforehand that the foreman dislikes the Irish. Murphy suggests to the other two that they give English...
Mick and Paddy had promised their uncle Seamus, who had been a seafaring gent all his life, to bury him at sea when he died. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the boys kept their promise....
A young woman was preparing for her wedding. She asked her mother to go out and buy a nice long black negligee and carefully place it in her suitcase so it would not wrinkle. Well, Mom forgot until...
A city slicker wanted to buy a farm. He found just what he was looking for. During an inspection of the property, however, he found a hive of bees. He told the owner that he was deathly afraid of...
What a rip-off. I went into our local bookstore and saw this huge display with a sign saying "Newly translated from the original French: 37 mating positions." Noticing that the books were...
i hope Star doesn't mind, but here is another Pam Ayres poem I like. THE EMBARRASSING EXPERIENCE WITH THE PARROT. At the Cotswold Wild Life Park, In the merry month of May, I paid the man the money,...
After a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter. Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand....
A guy walks into his doctor's office and says, "Ddddoc, I've bbbeen sssttttuttering ffor yyears and III'm tired of it. Ccccan yyyou hehehelp mmme???" The doc says, "Well, I'll have to...
Once upon a time, there was a river. The Nile River, to be exact. On one side of the river lived the rabbit, and on the other side lived the bear. One fine day, the bear was sitting on a stump,...
HIGH NOONER JEREMIAH'S JOHNSON TRUE, HE GRITS THE PLEASURE OF THE SIERRA, PADRE THE MAN WHO SHOT ALL OVER LIBERTY VALANCE HOW THE WEST WAS HUNG THE WILD BRUNCH HE WORE A YELLOW RIBBON THE LEGEND OF...
If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want....
Visitors: Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its...
1. Do not allow closed doors in any room. To get a door open, stand on hind legs and scratch the frame. You may also reach under the door and pull clothing towards you; sulks get the quickest...
An Englishman ,a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all to give speeches to the Deaf Society. All are keen to make an impression on their audience. The Englishman goes first and to the surprise of his...
Last summer, when the power mower was broken and wouldn't run Jane kept hinting to Bob, her husband that he needed to get it fixed. However, for some reason the message wasn't sinking in. She finally...
