A dental hygienist had a family come in one day for their teeth to be cleaned. By the time she was ready for the father, he informed her she had a lot to live up to. His six-year-old daughter kept...
So there's this Japanese man watching a jazz band. In the interval he goes up to the guitarist and says "Can you play - jazz chord?" The guitarist says "Yeah, how about Cmaj9", and plays the chord....
One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?" The...
A man walks into a bar. “Can I have a pint of less please?” he asks. “I’m sorry sir,” the barman replies, looking slightly puzzled. “I’ve not come across that one before, is it a...
Has anyone lost a large wad of twenty pound notes?
.
Wrapped in an elastic band?
.
Please get in touch as soon as possible.
I have found the elastic band....
Two Irish lads Pat & Mick are drinking in a bar. Pat says to Mick "I had my way with that blonde lass that I met last night" Mick replies to him and says. "Will you be seeing her again later tonight?"...
A man is fishing and hooks a salmon, he reels it in and is just going to kill it for his dinner when the salmon looks at him and says, "Hey mate, don't kill me, I'm only a baby, I haven't swum the...
I got chatting to a chinese man at a party last night.
I asked him what he did for a living.
He said "I'm a pirate."
I said oh, you sail a ship?
He said "No, I fry pranes."...
A sale representative stops at a small manufacturing plant. He presents a box of cigars to the manager as a gift. "No, thanks," says the plant manager. "I tried smoking a cigar once, but I didn't like...
A woman buys a new phone. She decides to surprise her husband who is seated on the sofa in the living room. She goes to the kitchen and calls her husband with the new number. She says, "Hello...
