The Mail On Sunday Prize Crossword 00...
Crosswords3 mins ago
Tentacles!...
Heres that six quid I owe you! Get it? Sick squid!
A guy was fired from his job at the Dorito's factory, after going berserk with a forklift truck, knocking over stacks of produce.
Former colleagues said, he had a big chip on his shoulder...
A young Eskimo boy comes in from school.
"Mum, what's for dinner tonight ?"
"Vera Lynn", said his mother.
"Ohhh, no - not whale meat again !!"...
A Penguin rushed into a a shop and asked the shopkeeper.
"Have you seen my brother ?".
The shopkeeper said in response,
"What does he look like ?"...
Dave drowned, so at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt.
Well, it's what he would have wanted....
I'm off to Bill Hayley's fish restaurant tonight, they sell Hake. Haddock and Sole.
A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she...
My friend said she thought that all brushes and brooms are useless.
I thought "that's a sweeping statement"...
Skydiving is probably not for you
Did you hear about the thoughtful Scotsman who was heading for the pub ?. He turned to his wee wife before leaving and said, "Sheila, put your hat and coat on, lassie". She replied, "Ach, John, that's...
There was an explosion in a cheese factory in France.
Da brie was spread over a wide area...
I owe so much money to my herb seller that he's threatening to send round the bay leaf...
There was a Scottish painter named Smokey Macgregor who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often thinned down his paint to make it go a wee bit further. As it happened, he got...
My Alphabet A's for arthritis; B's the bad back, C's the chest pains, perhaps car-d-iac? D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can't read that top line! F is for fissures and fluid...
Do you like chimney jokes?
I've got stacks of them.
The first one is on the house...
Why do Sharks circle you before attacking? Two great white sharks, swimming in the ocean, spied survivors of a sunken ship. "Follow me son," the father shark said to the son shark and they swam to the...
Yes, we are back in business
I used to be into ham radio, but all I could hear was crackling....
My life is so boring that the person who stole my identity gave it back to me.
..struggle with technology
https:/
