ChatterBank0 min ago
On the way to a scientific conference, Albert Einstein notices his driver that looks a bit like him, and says "I'm sick of all these conferences. I always say the same things over and over!" The...
Charlie was in court for a double murder and the judge said, "You are charged with beating your wife to death with a spanner." A voice at the back of the courtroom yelled out, "You ***!" The judge...
HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings' horses,
And all the kings' men.
Had scrambled eggs,
For breakfast again....
A mortician was working late one night. He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen! "I'm sorry...
I have an irrational fear of German sausages. I fear the wurst.
Forgot my password on a site , so had to re set it . Computer asked me a security question - '' What was the name of your first Manager '' ? I typed the name in and the computer is telling me it's...
and this guy asked me if he could come in and talk about vacuuming my carpets.
I quickly made my excuses and closed the door.
I think he was a jehoovers witness...
https:/ /www.bb c.co.uk /news/u k-scotl and-edi nburgh- east-fi fe-6262 6292
Blimey! The dad jokes on here are better than that....
Liz Truss has been criticised for wasting energy because her lights are on but nobody's home.
I like to play chess with old men in the park.
Mind you, it’s hard to find 32 of them....
A prince was put under a spell so that he could speak only one word each year. If he didn’t speak for two years, the following year he could speak two words and so on. One day, he fell in love with a...
My Irish friend bounces off the walls on the way home from the pub.
His name? Rick O'Shea....
https:/ /ibb.co /NNLb3M C...
Before computer speak: Memory was something you lost with age An application was for employment A program was a TV show A cursor used profanity A keyboard was a piano A web was a spider's home A virus...
I am Buzz Aldrin, second man on the moon, Neil before me.
A friend of mine gets in an awful state, when trying to organise his wardrobe.
I think he could do with some 'anger management...
My wife came in from the garden slamming the door and yelling that next door's dog had been in our garden and left dog poo all over the place AGAIN! I told her to calm down, get the shovel and throw...
A woman's poem: He didn't like the casserole And he didn't like my cake. My biscuits were too hard... Not like his mother used to make. I didn't perk the coffee right He didn't like the stew, I didn't...
A police officer caught two kids playing with a firework and a car battery.
He charged one and let the other off....
I went to a seafood disco party last night, I think I pulled a mussel!