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marval

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marval

Stressed Out

If you're stressing out, here are some comments you can use to help articulate your mood to others. 1. Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after. 2. I started out with nothing & still have...
18:06 Tue 10th Jul 20125 answers, last by maggiebee 22:28 Tue 10th Jul 2012
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marval

Top 24 Things You Wouldn’t Know Without the Movies

24. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down. 23. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving. 22. During all...
16:28 Tue 10th Jul 201231 answers, last by atalanta 20:41 Sat 21st Jul 2012
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marval

You Know You're a Dog Lover When.

1. You have more dog beds, chew toys, collars, leashes, harnesses, and dog crates than you have dogs. 2. You meet other people with dogs, and remember their dog's name within 30 seconds, but don't get...
16:41 Mon 09th Jul 20126 answers, last by CraigWhite 22:43 Mon 09th Jul 2012
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marval

You Know You're a Cat Lover When.

1. You get a present wrapped with a bow and ribbon and you think, "The cats are going to love playing with these later!" 2. You type using no capital letters because theres a cat on your arm...
16:30 Mon 09th Jul 20127 answers, last by nungate 18:47 Mon 09th Jul 2012
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marval

Do it right

A blonde and a brunette decided to rob a bank. They quickly devised a good plan and they put their plan to action. The brunette drove up to the front of the bank that they had decided to rob. She...
14:58 Mon 09th Jul 20125 answers, last by wildwood 23:59 Mon 09th Jul 2012
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marval

Did you?

Did you hear Lassie had a son with a Rottweiler? It rips off your arm, and then runs for help....
14:57 Mon 09th Jul 20123 answers, last by Starbuckone 17:38 Mon 09th Jul 2012
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marval

Lips moving

A certain vicar always started his service by saying "The Lord be with you", after which the congregation responded "And also with you. “One morning he mounted the pulpit and said...
17:15 Sun 08th Jul 20128 answers, last by tonyav 15:05 Mon 09th Jul 2012
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marval

To laugh or not to laugh

There was once a handyman who had a dog named Mace. Mace was a great dog except he had one weird habit: he liked to eat grass - not just a little bit, but in quantities that would make a lawnmower...
16:20 Sun 08th Jul 20127 answers, last by missprim 15:12 Mon 09th Jul 2012
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marval

Dracula

Dracula was walking along the road one night when he heard a noise from up above. He looked up to see sausage rolls, volo-vents, cucumber sandwiches, chicken wings and all sorts of party food tumbling...
16:20 Sat 07th Jul 20123 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 19:44 Mon 30th Jul 2012
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marval

A$$

The parish was very poor and the priest tried everything he could to raise money. But the Bingo games didn't work, the spaghetti dinners & pancake breakfasts didn't work, he even tried raffling an...
20:48 Fri 06th Jul 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 22:39 Sat 07th Jul 2012
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marval

What am I?

This useful tool is commonly found in the range of 8 inches in length. It's function is enjoyed by members of both sexes. It is usually found hung, dangling loosely and ready for instant action. It...
18:41 Fri 06th Jul 20128 answers, last by magicmick 22:41 Sat 07th Jul 2012
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marval

If James Bond had been a cat.

"The spy who licked me" "Gold paw" "Golden Cats Eye" "You only live nine times" "Litter-tray Raker" "Licence to mew" "The neighbourhood...
22:27 Thu 05th Jul 20127 answers, last by Wharton 23:32 Thu 05th Jul 2012
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marval

I'm impotent

A 97 year old man comes to his doctor looking depressed. He says "Doc, I think I'm impotent." The doctor sits him down and begins the standard speech he gives to senior citizens, about how...
20:45 Wed 04th Jul 20122 answers, last by Sqad 10:32 Thu 05th Jul 2012
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marval

Golf in the Bedroom

Rules of Play Each player shall provide his own equipment - normally one club and two balls. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the...
19:52 Wed 04th Jul 20127 answers, last by maggiebee 12:31 Mon 24th Jun 2013
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marval

It's over

"I'm finished with Judi!" Jon exclaimed to his friend. "What happened?" asked his friend. "She broke down and told me she was bisexual." "Who on earth wants to have...
20:29 Tue 03rd Jul 20126 answers, last by Brinjal 05:26 Wed 04th Jul 2012
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marval

Haircut

Female version: First Woman: Oh, you got a haircut! That's so cute! Second Woman: Do you think so? I wasn't sure when she gave me the mirror. I mean, you don't think it's too fluffy-looking? First...
17:49 Tue 03rd Jul 201211 answers, last by Jemisa 22:03 Tue 03rd Jul 2012
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marval

Oops

George had responded to a call from his lawyer, insisting that they meet at once. He arrived at his lawyer's firm, and was ushered into his office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible...
16:41 Tue 03rd Jul 20124 answers, last by Jemisa 22:06 Tue 03rd Jul 2012
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marval

Catholic Shampoo.

While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by the beer. The first nun said it would be nice to enjoy a beer. The second nun answered that, indeed, it would be very nice to have one, but...
20:25 Mon 02nd Jul 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 22:30 Mon 02nd Jul 2012
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marval

Adult fun

There were 2 old-maid sisters... both virgins. It's Friday night and Gladys looks at Betty and says, "I'm not going to die a virgin. I'm going out and I'm not coming home until I've been...
14:53 Mon 02nd Jul 201216 answers, last by albaqwerty 07:35 Tue 03rd Jul 2012
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marval

Sex Method

Some women are gathered and the subject of conversation turns to sex and then birth control. The first woman says "We're Catholic so we can't use it." The next woman says "I am too but...
18:01 Sun 01st Jul 20126 answers, last by boxtops 21:52 Sun 01st Jul 2012

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