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marval

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marval

Back

There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist. Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the...
21:13 Mon 18th Jun 20123 answers, last by albaqwerty 07:34 Tue 19th Jun 2012
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marval

Difference

Q. What is the difference between a bachelor and a married man? A. Bachelor comes home, sees what's in the refrigerator, goes to bed. Married man comes home, sees what's in the bed, and goes to the...
18:07 Mon 18th Jun 20123 answers, last by marval 18:14 Mon 18th Jun 2012
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marval

Home

A man came down with the flu and was forced to stay home one day. He was glad for the interlude because it taught him how much his wife loved him. She was so thrilled to have him around that when a...
15:44 Mon 18th Jun 20125 answers, last by brionon 14:41 Tue 19th Jun 2012
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marval

How to Photograph a New Puppy

1. Remove film from box and load camera. 2. Remove film box from puppy’s mouth and throw in the rubbish. 3. Remove puppy from the rubbish and brush coffee grounds from puppy's nose. 4. Choose a...
13:14 Mon 18th Jun 201211 answers, last by wolf63 18:38 Mon 18th Jun 2012
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marval

Why it’s nice to be a dog

No one expects you to take a bath every day. Your friends never expect you to pay for lunch, dinner, or anything else for that matter. When it’s raining, you can lie around the house all day and...
11:59 Mon 18th Jun 20122 answers, last by Starbuckone 19:00 Mon 18th Jun 2012
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marval

Hungry Cannibals

Two hungry cannibals are walking through the woods and find a man who recently died. Seizing the opportunity, one cannibal says to the other, "Check this out! You start at the feet and I'll start...
13:19 Sun 17th Jun 20128 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 19:23 Mon 30th Jul 2012
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marval

Account

A mother decided that her young 11 year old daughter should open her own bank account. "As it will be your account, I think that you should complete the application form" said the mother....
12:26 Sun 17th Jun 20125 answers, last by Starbuckone 17:55 Sun 17th Jun 2012
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marval

Biggest

Two middle-aged couples go on a camping trip. The men stay in one tent and the women stay in the other. At about two in the morning one man wakes up and says, "Oh my gosh!" He says, “I...
23:12 Sat 16th Jun 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 10:16 Sun 17th Jun 2012
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marval

Picasso

Spanish painter Pablo Picasso encountered a thief at work in his mansion. The intruder got away, and the police were called. Picasso offered to do a rough sketch of what the thief looked like. On the...
18:53 Sat 16th Jun 20122 answers, last by Starbuckone 10:20 Sun 17th Jun 2012
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marval

Sorry in advance.

Two dogs and a cat tried to get into the local opera house. "I'm sorry", said the doorman "animals aren't allowed in. "But we're very musical animals", said one of the dogs....
15:04 Sat 16th Jun 20124 answers, last by marval 15:50 Sat 16th Jun 2012
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marval

Have a laugh

A man was seriously injured in a car accident, severely damaging his legs. As soon as the emergency room doctor examined him, he knew the one of the man's legs must be amputated. He was taken to...
20:51 Fri 15th Jun 20125 answers, last by tenrec 13:14 Sat 16th Jun 2012
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marval

The Proposal

One evening, a young woman came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Anthony proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because...
16:26 Fri 15th Jun 20125 answers, last by tenrec 13:10 Sat 16th Jun 2012
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I still love the Irish.

'My long lost brother is returning on Sunday. I haven't seen him since he left Ireland thirty years ago,' said Mick. 'He wrote to say he'll be arriving at Shannon airport at eight in the morning.' 'If...
13:57 Fri 15th Jun 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 22:54 Fri 15th Jun 2012
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marval

I love the Irish.

“What's wrong with Murphy?” asked Father Green. “I don't know, Father. Yesterday he swallowed a spoon and he hasn't stirred since,”' said Mrs Murphy. “'I'd like some...
10:03 Fri 15th Jun 20128 answers, last by marval 22:49 Fri 15th Jun 2012
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Irish Logic

An Australian was in Ireland. On his way to Belfast, he stopped at a bar and asked one of the locals, "What's the quickest way to Belfast?" The Irishmen asked, "Are you walking or...
21:58 Thu 14th Jun 201212 answers, last by marval 14:55 Sat 16th Jun 2012
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Yorkshire Sex

Bloke takes his girlfriend up to his flat for the very first time. 'Ere', he says, 'you get dressed up in these oil-skins and sou'wester.' Being quite keen on the dressing-up scene, she rapidly...
16:41 Thu 14th Jun 20126 answers, last by Starbuckone 22:26 Thu 14th Jun 2012
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marval

UFO

A flying saucer landed at a petrol station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in...
21:37 Wed 13th Jun 201212 answers, last by zebo 19:26 Thu 14th Jun 2012
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marval

Police

An elementary school class goes on a field trip to the police station. The Officer points to the 10 most wanted list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA. A little Boy...
15:16 Wed 13th Jun 20124 answers, last by chaptazbru 20:31 Wed 13th Jun 2012
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marval

Because

For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not...
21:26 Tue 12th Jun 20129 answers, last by marval 23:14 Tue 12th Jun 2012
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Checkout Line

A woman was waiting in the checkout line at a shopping centre. Her arms were heavily laden with a mop and broom and other cleaning supplies. By her agitated state of mind and angry demeanour, it was...
17:17 Tue 12th Jun 20123 answers, last by Starbuckone 22:34 Tue 12th Jun 2012

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