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marval

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marval

When it comes to sex

Accountants do it with Double Entry Acupuncturists do it with a small prick Ambulance drivers come quicker Australians do it Down Under Bankers do it with interest Bartenders do it on the Rocks Chess...
23:03 Sat 25th Feb 20125 answers, last by tonyav 12:50 Sun 26th Feb 2012
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marval

Got to tell someone about this

A young single guy is on a cruise ship, having the time of his life. On the second day of the cruise, the ship slams into an iceberg and begins to sink. Passengers around him are screaming, flailing,...
17:34 Fri 24th Feb 20122 answers, last by Capeman 18:30 Fri 24th Feb 2012
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marval

10 Words That Don't Exist, But Should

1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks'trus) adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub tap on and off with your toes. 2. CARPERPETUATION (kar'pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a...
21:43 Wed 22nd Feb 201259 answers, last by The Builder 17:35 Thu 08th Mar 2012
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marval

Dig

A team of archaeologists are excavating in Israel when they find a cave with the symbols of a woman, a donkey, a shovel, a fish, and a Star of David on the wall. The head archaeologist points to the...
18:22 Tue 21st Feb 20123 answers, last by shooty 21:32 Tue 21st Feb 2012
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marval

Moose

Two hunters went moose hunting every winter without success. Finally, they came up with a foolproof plan. They got a very authentic female moose costume and learned the mating call of a female moose....
23:11 Mon 20th Feb 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 23:13 Mon 20th Feb 2012
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marval

Ouch

A man travelling by plane and in urgent need to use the men's room is nervously tapping his foot on the floor of the aircraft. Each time he tried the men's' room door, it was "Occupied". The...
16:01 Mon 20th Feb 20127 answers, last by HowardLink 09:46 Wed 25th Sep 2013
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marval

Tug

The new bride was a little confused about what to do with her husband's constant erection. "Don't worry about it", advised her husband. "When you want to make love, tug it three times....
16:18 Sun 19th Feb 20121 answer, last by tonyav 11:08 Mon 20th Feb 2012
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marval

Isn't that

There was a foursome of ladies about to play a par three, 165 yards long. Suddenly, out from the trees beside the fairway a streaker ran across the open expanse of the fairway. In a gasp, one lady...
19:58 Sat 18th Feb 20122 answers, last by Starbuckone 22:51 Sat 18th Feb 2012
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marval

Birth control pill

The Cadbury's Candy Co. and Merck Drug Co. have combined to market the new Mint flavoured birth control pill that women may take immediately before sex. The Pill will be distributed by the large major...
15:08 Sat 18th Feb 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 22:50 Sat 18th Feb 2012
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marval

Needs tuning

A man moved to another town where he didn't know anyone. In the move, his old piano was jarred, and of course it needed to be tuned when the man arrived. So he asked around, and was told that Earl...
19:17 Fri 17th Feb 20121 answer, last by wildwood 21:06 Fri 17th Feb 2012
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marval

Lubricant

Murphy's' old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come. He brought her to the doctor and the doctor began to deliver the baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at...
23:42 Thu 16th Feb 20126 answers, last by Dickythecook 14:48 Fri 17th Feb 2012
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marval

The Consultations

A beautiful girl is about to undergo a minor operation. She's laid on a hospital trolley bed with nothing on, except a sheet over her. The nurse pushes the trolley down the corridor towards the...
19:12 Thu 16th Feb 20121 answer, last by wildwood 02:50 Fri 17th Feb 2012
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marval

At last

Mrs. Smith pulled Mrs. Jones out of earshot of the porch, where Mrs. Jones' lovely young daughter, Linda, sat. "It is really none of my business," whispered Mrs. Smith, "but have you...
16:29 Thu 16th Feb 2012
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marval

Wrong Idea

The attractive young thing was about to go to bed with her blind date for the evening when she broke into tears. "I'm afraid you'll get the wrong idea about me" she sobbed. "I'm really...
21:17 Wed 15th Feb 20123 answers, last by sidkid 02:26 Thu 16th Feb 2012
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marval

The Banana Test

There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals, a Lion, a Chimpanzee, a Giraffe, and a Squirrel, who pass by. They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the...
21:10 Tue 14th Feb 201211 answers, last by zebo 14:28 Wed 15th Feb 2012
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marval

Dog Maths

A farmer is wondering how many sheep he has in his field, so he asks his sheepdog to count them. The dog runs into the field, counts them, and then runs back to his master. "So," says the...
16:22 Tue 14th Feb 20127 answers, last by wildwood 02:12 Wed 15th Feb 2012
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marval

A real man

A real man is a woman's best friend. He will never stand her up and never let her down. He will reassure her when she feels insecure and comfort her after a bad day. He will inspire her to do things...
09:37 Tue 14th Feb 20124 answers, last by Grandma_Yiddo 14:21 Tue 14th Feb 2012
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marval

Birthday mistake

Sam's girlfriend's birthday was the same day as his father's. He bought his girlfriend a bottle of perfume and his father a pistol. He wrapped the perfume and wrote a note to his girlfriend, saying,...
13:59 Mon 13th Feb 20123 answers, last by wildwood 04:49 Tue 14th Feb 2012
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marval

Oh dear

The local courtroom was packed as testimony began in the sentencing hearing of a woman convicted of murdering her husband of 20 years by poisoning his coffee. The defence attorney knew he had his work...
10:28 Mon 13th Feb 20125 answers, last by Essaitch57 15:14 Mon 13th Feb 2012
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marval

Important Operation

An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to get the anaesthesia, he asked to speak to his...
21:40 Sun 12th Feb 20122 answers, last by Starbuckone 22:49 Sun 12th Feb 2012

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