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marval

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marval

The Big Red One

Santa Claus needed a vacation. He decided to go to Texas because it was warm and he had heard that the people were friendly. As soon as he arrived in town, people began to point and say, "Look!...
21:43 Tue 10th Jan 20121 answer, last by Bumpkin_Clumber 00:02 Sat 10th Mar 2012
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marval

How to call the police

How to call the police, when you are old and don’t move fast anymore. George Phillips , an elderly man, from Meridian , Mississippi , was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left...
15:06 Tue 10th Jan 20123 answers, last by Baldric 20:00 Tue 10th Jan 2012
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marval

Farewell Luncheon

The staff at an office were hosting a farewell luncheon for a retiring colleague. As the group prepared to go to the restaurant, they found that they couldn't fit the giant balloon they had purchased...
22:26 Mon 09th Jan 20121 answer, last by Jemisa 22:39 Mon 09th Jan 2012
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marval

Party crashers

It was at a party and the host was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments. She was sure that not all of these people had been invited but didn't know how to...
22:28 Sun 08th Jan 20123 answers, last by Baldric 10:59 Mon 09th Jan 2012
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marval

Things kids say

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother... "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!" A little...
13:52 Sun 08th Jan 20123 answers, last by Jemisa 15:35 Sun 08th Jan 2012
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marval

Money isn't everything

Money isn't everything It can buy a house, but not a home. It can buy a bed, but not sleep. It can buy a clock, but not time. It can buy you a book, but not knowledge. It can buy you a position, but...
23:23 Sat 07th Jan 20123 answers, last by marval 13:23 Sun 08th Jan 2012
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marval

Air swimming anyone?

Has anyone seen this?
19:12 Sat 07th Jan 201211 answers, last by B00 20:59 Sat 07th Jan 2012
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marval

Sunday school

A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' mother's name?" They all knew. "Mary," they answered in unison. The teacher then asked, "Does anyone know what Jesus'...
15:28 Sat 07th Jan 20123 answers, last by Starbuckone 23:30 Sat 07th Jan 2012
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marval

Class Reunion

Rachel, Clare and Samantha haven't seen each other since High School. They rediscover each other via a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar. Rachel arrives first, wearing beige...
20:05 Fri 06th Jan 20123 answers, last by missprim 00:48 Sat 07th Jan 2012
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marval

Lexiphiles

To write with a broken pencil is pointless. When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A. The...
22:24 Thu 05th Jan 201212 answers, last by Starbuckone 00:02 Sat 07th Jan 2012
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marval

Road rage

A father, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort with his family at the weekends. Every Sunday morning he would take his daughter out for a drive in the car. One particular...
22:51 Wed 04th Jan 2012
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marval

Elephant

From the diary of a Pre-School Teacher My five-year old students are learning to read Yesterday one of them pointed at a picture in a zoo book and said, "Look at this! It's a frickin' elephant! I...
15:10 Wed 04th Jan 20123 answers, last by Starbuckone 20:25 Wed 04th Jan 2012
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marval

Tough

"I've just had the most awful time," said a boy to his friends. "First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis. then they gave me...
17:52 Tue 03rd Jan 20122 answers, last by tenrec 18:37 Tue 03rd Jan 2012
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marval

Time’s up

Little Johnny's father was a pastor in a small church. One day, his father told Little Johnny that a very important bishop was coming and that he would be staying with them. Little Johnny became very...
10:38 Tue 03rd Jan 20123 answers, last by marval 18:47 Tue 03rd Jan 2012
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marval

Walking is especially beneficial

The room was full of pregnant women and their partners, and the antenatal class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with informing the men how to...
15:05 Mon 02nd Jan 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 23:42 Mon 02nd Jan 2012
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marval

Spiritually

Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?" "I think so," the man replied. "My...
12:54 Sun 01st Jan 20121 answer, last by Starbuckone 23:08 Sun 01st Jan 2012
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marval

Wedding night

Newlyweds, Tim and Nancy, spent their wedding night at a hotel. The following morning, Nancy's closest friend, Jennifer, came over and asked them how their wedding night went. "I'm so...
22:27 Fri 30th Dec 20113 answers, last by askyourgran 23:48 Fri 30th Dec 2011
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marval

No entry

Several years ago, the Catholic Church required women to wear a head covering in order to enter the sanctuary. One Sunday a lady arrived without her head covering. The priest tells her that she cannot...
14:31 Fri 30th Dec 20113 answers, last by Starbuckone 23:37 Fri 30th Dec 2011
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marval

Anniversary Gift

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really annoyed. She told him, "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds...
21:40 Thu 29th Dec 20116 answers, last by Ann86 23:59 Thu 29th Dec 2011
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marval

Flavours

"What flavours of ice cream do you have?" inquired the customer. "Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate," answered the new waitress in a hoarse whisper. Trying to be sympathetic, the...
16:12 Thu 29th Dec 20115 answers, last by owdhamer 20:28 Thu 29th Dec 2011

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