Some time ago, there was this artist, who worked from a studio in his home. He specialized in nudes, and had been working on what he thought would be a masterpiece for several months now. As usual,...
Two friends meet in the office of one of them, a notorious techo-geek. "Hey, bud, how are you?" "I'm good. Congratulations, that new secretary of yours is beautiful!" "Well,...
There was a man that owned a giant gorilla and, all its life, he had never left it on its own. But he had to go on a business trip and leave his gorilla in the care of his next-door neighbour. So he...
'Get in there you big furry oaf, I don't care what you smell!' 'Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?' 'Put that thing away before you get us all killed.' 'You've got...
A guy met this girl in a bar and asked, "May I buy you a drink?" "Okay, but it won't do you any good." A little later, he asks, "May I buy you another drink?" "Okay,...
A 2nd grade teacher decides to teach sex education. to her class. She starts out by drawing a penis on the chalk board and asks the class, "Does anyone know what this is?" And little Johnny...
A little girl and her mother were out and about. Out of the blue, the girl asked her mother, "Mommy, How old are you?" The mother responded, "Honey, women don't talk about their age....
Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk. As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says, Vietnam, 1969."...
An antelope was asked to go to a dance. She bought a new dress and necklace for the dance. Then she had her horns and hooves done. Since she lived alone, she struggled to dress herself. Running late,...
Ever noticed how deleting one word after the other in a sentence can lead to a nice story? Here's an example: Oh John please don't touch me at all Oh John please don't touch me Oh John please don't...
There were these three guys. They had been walking for 3 days and were very tired. They found a hotel, rented a room and went to sleep. Then, this old guy comes in out of nowhere, and says there is a...
Paddy was walking through town one day when he saw a shop with a notice in the window. The notice said, "We sell everything". Paddy could not believe this so he went inside. He walked to the...
A man walks into a bar, late one night completely knackered and dripping with sweat and orders 5 whiskies. "What's wrong with you?" The barman says. "In my car I've got a nymphomaniac -...
Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men....that night all three will wear a black leather bra, stiletto's and a...
A man, Bob, and his friend Joe went out hunting. This was Joe’s first time ever hunting, so he was following Bob’s lead. Bob saw a small herd of deer and told Joe to stay in the exact spot...
The wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and says, "Honey, do you remember this?" He looks up at...
A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who was at the beach pretty much every day. She wasn't unusual, nor was the travel bag she carried,...
