Shaglene Member Profile in The AnswerBank

My X!

My X was an absolute treasure. I say this because just like treasure, you'll probably need a map and a shovel to find her....

Patsy33

Firefighters

Some people say that firefighters deserve more money, but apparently a poll was taken and they all fell through a hole in the floor..

marval

A young boy was spending a Sunday afternoon with his grandpa. Looking at pictures of his grandpa in his military uniform, the boy asked, "Grandpa, did you ever kill anyone in the war?" "No champ, I...

Voltage

Snooker Accident!

A lorry carrying a load of snooker equipment has crashed on the M25... The driver is under a rest and the cues go back miles!...

Voltage

Cold Outside

You know it's starting to get cold outside when you trip over dog poo rather than stand in it! I was so cold today that my jaw started to freeze... So I gritted my teeth....

marval

I Always Wanted

One hot summer day, a blonde came to town with her dog, tied it under the shade of a tree, and headed into a restaurant for something cold to drink. Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the...

Voltage

Wedding Day

People who say their wedding day is the BEST day of their lives... Have never had two chocolate bars fall from a vending machine at the same time!...

zabado

Horse Racing.

My wife says I have an obsession with horse racing and is leaving me and taking the kids with her. I can see them now through the window they're walking down the garden path, they're at the gate . . ....

Patsy33

Worst Film...

This bloke said to me “Do you know Marie Osmond is about to appear in the world’s worst film?” I said “Warner Brothers?” He said “I already have!”...

Voltage

Mayonnaise !

Just dropped my phone in mayonnaise. Feking hellman!...

Voltage

A Magician

A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience was different each week so he did same tricks over and over. The problem was, the captain's parrot saw all the shows and began to...

Bazile

1000 Volts

I built an electric fence around my property . My neighbour is dead against it...

Shaglene

Visits To The Vets............

I took my dog to the vets. He picked him up, examined him and said that he will have to put my dog down. I asked if it was that serious. He said, "No. Its just that he is getting heavy." I took my...

Patsy33