Donate SIGN UP

Hopkirk

421 to 440 of 1163

First Previous 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 Next Last

Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I was at sea the other day and a load of meat floated past. It was a bit choppy....
05:21 Thu 26th May 20225 answers, last by Patsy33 09:50 Thu 26th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Predicting The Future

Arthur C Clarke was very far sighted. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wC3E2qTCIY8...
06:49 Wed 25th May 20223 answers, last by Hopkirk 06:52 Wed 25th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I went for a walk with a girl the other day. When she noticed me we went for a run....
05:48 Wed 25th May 20223 answers, last by Patsy33 11:56 Wed 25th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

My career is completely in ruins. I just took a job as an archaeologist....
06:29 Tue 24th May 202210 answers, last by murraymints 06:09 Wed 25th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Pitch Invasions

There's a lot in the news recently about the problem of pitch invasions. They could stop it by informing all the fans that anyone identified as going onto the pitch would receive a ban from all...
06:09 Mon 23rd May 202247 answers, last by Ken4155 14:19 Tue 24th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I went to the record shop and said "What have you got by The Doors?" The assistant replied "a couple of fire extinguishers"....
05:45 Mon 23rd May 20228 answers, last by DTCwordfan 06:39 Tue 24th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Misheard Lyrics

For a bit of fun, tell us what you hear(incorrectly) in song lyrics. We can then see if we recognise the song. I'll start: "The dogs say goodnight"...
15:02 Sun 22nd May 202260 answers, last by jno 22:48 Sun 22nd May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I have decided to quit my job as a personal trainer, because the weights are too heavy. I'm going to hand in my too weak notice....
05:44 Sun 22nd May 202212 answers, last by Patsy33 14:56 Sun 22nd May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I worked as a tailor for a few months. I wasn't really suited to it, and the work was so so....
06:26 Sat 21st May 202213 answers, last by Canary42 16:20 Sat 21st May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I hired a handyman and gave him a list of jobs to do. When I checked later he had done numbers 1, 3, 5 and 7. It turns out he only does odd jobs....
05:54 Fri 20th May 20226 answers, last by Patsy33 09:39 Fri 20th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Colleen Rooney

She is not in court for the last day, because she has gone on holiday. She deserves a break, she works so hard...
11:18 Thu 19th May 202221 answers, last by William51 09:04 Fri 20th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I took a test last week to see if I could become an insect inspector. I think I will get the job, as I boxed all the right ticks....
05:29 Thu 19th May 202211 answers, last by Arksided 11:56 Thu 19th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I work as a lifeguard. It's my job to actively fight natural selection....
05:44 Wed 18th May 20225 answers, last by Chipchopper 14:19 Wed 18th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Pudding

Are you a desserts person? Personally I don't understand why, after a nice savoury meal, there is a tradition to squeeze in a sugary and fatty follow up....
15:38 Tue 17th May 202217 answers, last by MissTerious 09:44 Wed 18th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I've been trying to break up with an optician recently. It's really hard. Every time I say I can't see her any more she moves an inch closer and says "how about now?"...
06:50 Tue 17th May 202211 answers, last by Patsy33 09:59 Tue 17th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I am addicted to brake fluid, but I can stop whenever I want....
07:32 Mon 16th May 20222 answers, last by Hopkirk 08:05 Mon 16th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I phoned the local ramblers club. The guy who answered just went on and on....
05:53 Sun 15th May 20222 answers, last by 1ozzy 09:59 Sun 15th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

OCD. I've checked three or four hundred times, and I definitely don't have it.
05:49 Sat 14th May 20227 answers, last by Bazile 12:08 Sat 14th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The

My new girlfriend asked me what I do for a job, and I told her I work in a bowling alley. She said "Ten pin?" "No, it's a permanent position" I told her....
05:40 Fri 13th May 20228 answers, last by DTCwordfan 06:28 Fri 13th May 2022
Avatar Image
Hopkirk

Dad Joke Of The Day

I saw this bloke who was a cross between an ostrich and a serial killer. He was always burying other people’s heads in the sand...
05:54 Thu 12th May 20224 answers, last by Canary42 12:39 Thu 12th May 2022

421 to 440 of 1163

First Previous 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 Next Last